Get it Together, Sam (Lesbian Story)

Chapter 15

Sam

I drive to the station as fast as I could, breaking any speed limit to get there the quickest way possible. In about fifteen minutes I arrive. I walk in and Jennifer is waiting on the bench just inside the police station. She must be done for questioning. She gets up as soon as she sees me and gives me a hug. I can hear her sniffles. This must be so hard for her, to learn that her "boyfriend" is actually some wanted rapist.

"Did they catch him yet?" I ask. My hands are trembling and my heart is beating fast. 

"Yeah, they're on their way here." She says, crying onto my shoulder again. She has to bend quite a lot since she's so god damn tall.

"This is why you need to let me interview these creeps." I say to her, trying to keep calm for her. 

"I know and I'm sorry." She says, trying to laugh through the tears.

"You don't need to be sorry. It's not your fault."

"I just really thought he would actually be good."

"We just never have a way of really knowing." I say this because I don't even know myself right now. I didn't think that I would ever be the one to cheat. I need to see Alicia and see how she's doing.

As soon as Jennifer pulls away from our hug, three police officers and a handcuffed Matt come through the door. This makes me think of the whole James incident all over again. I wonder what happened to him. I know he was arrested and all that but I wonder how he's holding up. Maybe he and Matt can become great friends. They disgust me. They just use women as some sort of tool to fulfill their needs.

Matt stares at both me and Jennifer as he passes through and into another room. I look at Jennifer and I see that she is fighting tears. I give her one more hug to show her that I support her in her time of need.

"Call me if you need me." It's Officer Johnson's voice getting louder as he walks closer.

"I will thanks." Alicia says to him, giving him a hug goodbye.

"Can you drive her home?" Officer Johnson says to a colleague of his.

I look down trying to hide my face so that I don't bother Alicia. She probably doesn't want to see me right now. The hiding doesn't work though; Alicia sees me right away and walks towards me. I pretend not to see her.

"Sam." Alicia says.

"Alicia. Hey." I say to her.

"How are you?" She asks awkwardly, putting her hands in her pockets.

"I'm good and I'm guessing you're not doing so well."

"I don't know, honestly."

I hug her and she doesn't wrap her arms around me at first but then I feel her hands on my back after a second or two. I wish I could just undo the past few days for her. I just don't like seeing her like this. The hug lasts for about a minute before she is pulled away by an officer to be taken home. I sigh. I need to make things right with her.

*

3 A.M.

My phone rings and it wakes me up from my sleep. I don't open my eyes, instead I use my hand and aim for my phone on my bedside table, missing a few times but finding it eventually. I open my left eye and see that it's Alicia calling me. I answer.

"Alicia?" I ask in raspy voice, my morning voice.

"Hi," She says. "I can't sleep and I didn't know who else to call but you."

"Are you okay?"

"No, I'm not." She says as her voice breaks. I can hear her sobbing.

*

These early morning phone calls continue for a month. Ever since that day with Matt, Alicia's been having trouble sleeping. She can't sleep unless there's someone with her in the house and being in the dark alone scares her even more so she calls me up. We're still working out our problems but I feel every phone call helps us get closer to reach that goal. I just want her to be able to trust me again. The majority of our phone calls are just her telling me how she feels about any subject that comes to her head. I just lie in bed and listen to hear speak passionately about each one. I never try to argue with her because she would never let me win any argument. She's always got to be right, so I let her be right. I love our phone calls; I just never really admit it. It's the one time that I feel I can be totally real with anybody, where everything is pure. Nothing is ever sugar-coated with her and I love it.

This morning's phone call is different though. We don't speak. We just listen to each other's even breaths. It's not that we've run out of things to say, it's just that we feel completely safe and comfortable with each other again. I think we're almost back to the way we used to be.

"What are you thinking about?" She asks, the first words to be spoken that phone call.

"You." I say.

"Really? Like what?"

"I'm thinking about how much I regret ever hurting you."

"Sam, I-"

"It's your turn to listen to me."

"Okay."

"I guess I should start from the very beginning. I really liked, well more like loved, Megan before we started going out. I even had feelings for her that night we first kissed. But that kiss that we shared, it was amazing, you made me feel something that I've never felt before. Probably because it was my first kiss but still, it was amazing. I didn't completely forget about Megan but I couldn't stop thinking about you either. Then you asked me out and we went on that camp date and I started forgetting about Megan. As I got to know you, I started falling hard. When I told you I loved you, it was for real. Everything that we were was never a lie; I was truly in love with you. I still am. It sucks that we're not together anymore and I regret ever losing you. It's just that night when Megan and I kissed, the feelings came flooding back. You never really get over anyone I guess. I haven't gotten over you and I don't think I could ever forget about you. I acted impulsively and kissed her. I regret it. I regret hurting you. I regret not being able to save you from Matt. I just love you a lot. I love the slope of your nose. I love it when you cover your mouth whenever you laugh. Oh god, I love your laugh. I love your smile and the little crinkle that forms at the corner of your mouth when you do. I love the way you run. I love your body. I love your soul. I just love everything about you and I lost all that when I decided to be stupid that one night. I don't deserve you and it sucks."

Alicia doesn't say anything for a minute. Everything is silent between us until she finally says, "I never got over you either and it's going to be tough but I'm willing to work back to what we were before."

"Are you sure you want to try again?"

"Yeah, I'm only giving you one chance. So do you want to get back together?"

Do I say yes? I'm just scared of making the same mistakes again and hurting her again.

"If you're willing to try then I'm willing to try." I answer her question.

"Then it's settled, we're back together. Don't blow it." She says, letting out a little chuckle.

"So do you want to maybe redo that whole date in the field?" I ask nervously.

"Yeah, that'd be nice."