Loving The Beautiful Alpha

Chapter 28

"Sera... I am not mad at you. Or it is right to say I cannot and will never be mad at you." Marianne softly said.

"But why?" Sera finally asked. "I am being selfish right now. Your life is also on the line. If I keep on insisting not to let go of my mother, you and the other patients who can be saved will all die."

"Sera..."

"I know. I... I am aware that my mom... She... She is no longer with me."

Denying something through your head is different than admitting the truth out loud. Sera is not a fool. Although she keeps on hoping that her mother will wake up one day, the sight of her mother breathing with the help of the machine will never lie to her. She is aware that the machine connected to her mother's body is the only thing that keeps her heart beating.

She is just deluding herself in a fantasy that her mother will still open her eyes despite all the obvious shreds of evidence that she was gone a long time ago.

But the most obvious evidence for Sera is her mother's scent. Katarina smells like a freshly peeled orange mixed with the calming scent of lilies. Sera always love to bury her face on her mother's neck every night before going to sleep. Her mother's scent alone can make her feel safe and warm all the time.

But the first time she saw her mother after the incident, Sera cannot smell that familiar scent anymore. At first, she thought her mother's pheromones were also injured because of the accident. But soon she realized that is not the case. But Sera ignored it and continued making herself believe that her mother is just in a comatose state and she will soon open her eyes.

Even the stares that everyone is throwing at her are silently reminding Sera of the truth. She knows that they know her mother's real condition. They just do not have the heart to be harsh on her and slap the obvious truth right in front of her face. But still, she ignored it all and continued with her plan of waiting for the impossible.

"I know... I know my mother is gone. I know it since the beginning. But I refuse to acknowledge it. I still want to believe that everything is just a nightmare and my mother will soon open her eyes and call me with her sweet little nicknames for me. I keep on indulging in the web of lies I made for myself just to seek a little comfort. I know that I am being selfish, childish, and harsh to everyone. So why are you not mad at me?!"

She needs to know the answer. Why aren't they getting mad at her? Her uncle Gio, Benette, her auntie Marianne, the doctors and nurses who always monitor her mother's condition... All of them! They should be mad at her for being selfish and self-centered. She is just thinking of herself and never cares about the others.

Her dilemma was stopped when Marianne's gentle hands cupped her face. Lifting her head, Sera saw that her auntie has a soft smile on her face.

"Sera, no one is blaming you for it. We all know that we are asking too much from you. It is your mother's life. Everyone can understand the situation that you are facing right now."

"But—"

"As Katarina's daughter, of course, it will be hard for you to let her go. I am pretty sure that if the situation was reversed and Katarina is in your position, she will probably do the same because you are her daughter and she cannot just give up on you that easily."

"What if I refuse to let her go?" Sera asked again.

"Again, no one will blame you for it. You are just doing it because you are a daughter who still wants to be with her parent. For me, there is nothing wrong in holding on even for a small hope."

"But you can die because of it..."

Marianne smiled at her and fix the stray hair that falls on Sera's face.

"Then is it my fate. No one can stop anyone's death. If my time has really come, then I will accept it. You and your mother have no responsibility to it."

"But Benette and uncle Gio... They will surely become sad..."

"It is inevitable, my dear. But if I really die, I am confident that I did not leave them without showing how much I really love them. The only thing that will disappear is my body. But my heart and the memories we made will always remain with them."

Hearing the gentle voice of Marianne as she talked to her finally made a crack on Sera's heart. When she closed her eyes, the tears that she is trying to stop for a long time has fallen from her eyes. She did not try to conceal her tears anymore and just let herself cry. All those times, Marianne wrapped her arms around Sera and continued wiping her tears.

When Sera finally stopped crying, her cheeks were both red and her eyes were swollen that they sting every time she touch them. She apologized to Marianne for being such a bother to her despite her condition. Of course, Marianne did not accept her apology and instead asked her if she feels a bit better now. After reassuring her that she really feels okay, the nurse brought Marianne back to her room so she can have a rest.

At night, Sera stayed in the hospital to check on her mother's condition as usual. She was sitting on the stool placed next to the bed. Sera stares at her mother's face for a long time before she carefully holds her slightly cold hand. After that, she carefully placed it on her cheek and close her eyes.

"Mom... Am I really doing the right thing?" Sera carefully asked. "What if I will make a big mistake?"

Many said that Sera is too mature for her age. They always envied her mother for having such an independent and mature child who always knows what to do. But contrary to their expectation, the maturity that they had seen from her is just a facade.

Deep inside, Sera can also become childish and too selfish. She also makes a lot of mistakes that earns enough scolding from her mother. Sera is also too dependent on her mother that sometimes she needs to ask her for advice to see if she is doing the right choices or not.

"Mom... I... I've already made a decision." Sera said as her tears are threatening to fall again.

"Mom... Are you really not going to open your eyes again?" Sera asked. "Do you really leave me without any leaving any signs? Do you really miss papa so much that you left me without saying a word of goodbyes?"

Of course, no one will answer her questions. The only sound that Sera can hear is the soft beeping sounds of the machines and ventilators connected to her mother's body.