Let Me Be Your Angel (Camila/You)

19.

Y/N'S POV

I went through my kitchen searching for something for dinner. I was home alone preparing dinner for when everyone came back. I was dancing to music coming from my phone when the music stopped and my phone went off. I reached onto the counter to grab it and answered it without checking the caller I.D.

"Y/N'S whorehouse, you want 'em, we have 'em, come grab 'em, Frankie speaking," I said as I opened the pantry door and grabbed a jar of pasta sauce.

"Oh what a nice way to answer the phone, daughter."

The pasta sauce slipped from my hand and landed on the ground with a loud shatter and my entire body froze.

"H..how...d..did you get my number?" I stuttered out.

"A father has his ways, Y/n. Did you really think you could run away from me?" My father questioned from the other line. I could hear the sneer in his voice and see his evil eyebrow raise.

"I..I..."

"You're all over tv now. You and your shitty band are famous. And you have a famous whore girlfriend," he said. I immediately regained my confidence back.

"Don't talk about my friends or my girlfriend like that ever again!" I shouted.

"Do you know what you put us through?" my father asked blatantly ignoring my outburst, "You left us and now your mother is dead! She died looking for your worthless ass!"

I flinched as he shouted through the phone. It brought back memories but I quickly pushed those thoughts away. And focused on what I was just told. My mother was dead...I didn't know how to feel. I mean yes she participated in my beatings but she always looked guilty when going through with it. Like she didn't want to do it, but she didn't have a choice. She used to always give me food when I was locked away in my room without dinner. I could tell that at times she actually loved me. And now she was dead.

"I...it's not my fault," I said quietly trying desperately to hide the waver in my voice.

"It is! It is all your fault! You left us to go and sin like God couldn't see you! She searched for you and was hit by a drunk driver! It is your fault. It should have been you, you freak!"

I flinched as he shouted. I pulled the phone away from my ear but I could still hear him spewing venom.

"You don't deserve to live after all you've done. You're a burden and no one cares about you. I wish you were never born. Then I'd still have your mother and no child to be ashamed of. You deserve to die," was the last words he said before he hung up.

I held my phone in shock...My father wanted me to die...He wanted me gone. ...My mother was dead...I was a burden.
I was a sinner...I was something to be ashamed of...I deserved to die.

I screamed. I let out an ear piercing scream and threw my phone across the kitchen. I heard a shatter but I didn't care. I could feel the tears falling down my face. I grabbed the pot that was going to contain the pasta and I threw it across the kitchen. I punched a wall and yelled. Then I walked over to a drawer, I opened it, and I grabbed a knife from the counter and held it over my wrist.

Think about this Y/n, my conscience told me.

What's there to think about? I'm a burden. I deserve to die.

Think about Camila and the band. Think about how they'd feel if you died.

I knew my conscience was right. My girlfriend and family wouldn't be okay if I died. I screamed and slipped to the ground and cried as I pulled my knees to my chest and buried my face in my knees. I cried and screamed and yelled. I pulled at my hair and kicked and screamed. I didn't hear anyone come in until I was pulled into an embrace. I tried to fight it. I tried to pull away but I couldn't they just held me tighter.