love at school

Are we breaking up?

Dad arrived home this morning and thankfully all evidence of the house party from hell was cleaned up and dumped I just wish the events of that night could be removed that easily. I had to go back to school today and I knew id have to face John I could not avoid him no more and he will want to know what is going on with us if he is forgiven and so on and honestly I don't have any answers I don't know what I feel anymore.

I got myself ready and I left the house and walked to school and I was enjoying the silence it gave me time to think and collect my thoughts manly it gave me the strength to not just run off and avoid everything.

I walked up to the school entrance and the whole gang was standing there just waiting on me

" Tia " George shouted running towards me and pulling me into a tight hug

" oh jeez George your squeezing to tight" I say struggling to breath

" oh sorry"

I walked up to the rest of the gang and I could see how uncomfortable John was he was as anxious as I was

" right Tia come with me we need to talk" John said unable to handle the tension anymore and before I had the opportunity to protest he was pulling me to a isolated area of the school grounds

" I know I fucked up Tia I know I should of stayed with you but normally things go wrong for me and there is nothing that I can do but when Pete nearly raped you I saw red and I wanted to kill him for hurting you and I could not think of anything else other than wanting to rip his head of.  I was wanting to protect you in the only way I knew I could by finding Pete and making sure he could never hurt you again"

" I understand your train of thought but that was not what I needed. I needed you beside me making me feel better I did not need you chasing him when you knew you would see him. we all do go to the same school he is your best mate. I'm just so confused I just felt you were more focused on making yourself feel better than making sure I was ok."

" that's not true I went after him  to protect you so I could tell you that he is sorted that he could not hurt you again"

" I just feel like you don't love me or even care you are more focused on your own emotions mine don't even  matter to you. it was Paul who stopped Pete it was him that made sure I was ok not my boyfriend doesn't that speak volumes"

" I wont ever be able to match up will I? you are never able to be with me and see me your always comparing me to Macca and when your concerned I always fall short you always fall for his act. How mant  times has he hurt you? you ended up in hospital because of him and still you think he is perfect I never stood a fucking chance"

" don't turn this round on me don't turn this into a Paul verus John thing as its not all I'm saying is Paul was where you should of been"

" he was only there because he wants you back  I can see it and I can see you falling for it again and it will end up like it always did Paul in the arms of another girl and you hurt"

" John stop this stop turning this so it looks like I'm the one in the wrong. I was yours and faithfully yours it was you that ignored me at the party it was you that didn't even come to see where I was ok it was you that didn't even know I was nearly getting raped by your best friend and it was you that chose pete over me"

" what do you mean by I was yours? are you dumping me?"

Tia look a long time to think about her answer as she was so confused a huge part of her loved John he was always the one who she felt the most love for but she didn't know if they were good together and Paul was always grabbing her attention. she liked the way he treated her how he always made sure she was ok but he was the one who hurt her the  most in the past.

she had made her decision it was time she chose and this time she would give her all to this person she looked up into johns eyes and she was ready to tell him whom she chose