I've been a very bad babysitter (Old and unedited) 2013

~Naughty~ 2

Kale

Now, what to eat? Pizza... no, wait... Chicken... no... Pizza...

"Ouch!" I groan, as I get kicked out of my thoughts by a tiny foot connecting to the side of my ankle. I drop down dramatically, grabbing my ankle. "Ouch, Tristin! You got me, buddy," I congratulate him as I roll around like a little kid to trick him.

Tristin looks down at me with sad little green eyes. He got the pouty lip and green eyes from me. Then he drops to the floor next to me. "Uncle Kale, I'm sorry. I... I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm stronger than I thought. I really am." He grabs my ankle and rubs it. "You look a lot stronger than you really are, uncle Kale. No wonder why mommy calls you a weak little titty baby"

That little booger just called me weak, and wait... a titty?

I jump up real fast and pick Tristin up with me. "Ha! I got you, you little booger!" I throw him over my shoulder and run around the house with his little head bouncing off my shoulder. I almost trip over a shoe sitting in the middle of the floor, but I quickly jump over it.

Yeah, I'm good.

I run around the couch a few times, with Tristin screaming in my ear.

"Ouch... calm down, kiddo," I say. "You're going to make me go deaf."

He reaches up and grabs my ear, pulling it back. "Slow down, uncle Kale." He does a mixture of screaming and laughing, until I finally toss him on the couch. He looks up at me, breathing hard with his face beet red. "You're mean..."

I cross my arms, mocking him. "You're the mean one," I reply then put out my bottom lip and pout like him.

That's how I get the girls. They love the pouty lip. At least that's what I taught my nephew. It will get him out of trouble for a while at least.

Tristin just looks up at me and sticks his little tongue out. I snatch him up and carry him to the kitchen, setting him on the counter, before walking to the fridge. "Ok, buddy, I need your help."

He quickly looks over in my direction with a huge grin on his face. "Oh, I can help," he replies while he rubs his little hands together, his eyes wide.

"Okay buddy, this is a big one here... a big decision. Can you handle it?" I give him a serious look, as he bounces in his seat.

He nods his head up and down, fast. "Yes, uncle Kale. I'm smart, I promise!"

Sometimes I think he's too smart for his own good.

I pull out the left over pizza and some chicken. I hold it out in front of him, moving each container back and forth in front of his face as his eyes light up really big. "Alright... Pizza or chicken?"

He puts his hand on his chin and eyes them both, carefully. He's not taking this decision lightly. "Um... Let me think for a minute. Can I have a few minutes to think this over, uncle Kale?" He touches the chicken, and then moves over to the pizza.

Yeah, he's definitely one of the guys.

"Take your time, buddy," I say to him then look at my watch. "It's almost bed time." I smile. "Are you coming closer to making a decision yet?"

He smacks the plate of chicken. "I want chicken... I love chicken." He gives me a satisfied grin as I pick him up and set him on the ground.

Smiling, I throw the plate in the microwave and then bend down in front of him. "So tell me, what do you think about Kalise?"

Such a beautiful name... almost as pretty as her. I definitely wasn't expecting to be stunned today.

He throws himself in a chair and kicks his feet out. "She's nice I guess, but she needs to buy skittles."

This kid is in love with skittles. You're not cool to him unless you keep skittles in your pocket at all times. I swear if you turn my pants inside out all of the pockets are a mess of colors.

He looks at me with a shy smile. "She's pretty, uncle Kale. Don't you think so?"

I grab the food and place it in front of Tristin.

He totally forgets our conversation and just starts stuffing his face.

Yep! Definitely takes after me.

After our late dinner, I carry Tristin to my bed and tuck him in. It takes a lot to wear this kid down. I throw myself on the couch and just stare at the blank TV, lost in thought.

I smile as I picture the pretty blue eyed girl with sauce on her face. She looked completely embarrassed. I wanted so badly to just lean in and suck the sauce from her beautiful, full lips and let her know that I still wanted her.

Yeah, her friend was pretty, but there's just something about Kalise that makes me want to take her out. She looks sweet... maybe too sweet.

I can make her naughty.

I get snapped out of my thoughts when the front door opens and my good friend, Brendon, walks in with his cousin, Roxy.

Roxy looks at me with a tired look and then drops back on the couch. "Well boys, have fun."

With a grunt, I look at Brendon and then slap my forehead. "Oh shit, man. I forgot that you were coming. I don't know... maybe I should stay in tonight."

Brendon looks over at the bedroom door. "Come on, Tristin is sleeping, and I had to practically drag Roxy with me. You can't back out now. She throat-punched my ass and it hurt." He rubs his hands together with a smile, reminding me a little too much of a crazed maniac. "Dude, come on... come on... dude!" He points down at his old faded jeans. "I have my lucky jeans on tonight. You know what that means, right?"

Yes, that you're a moron that thinks a pair of jeans will actually get you laid.

I jump up, grabbing my black button down shirt out of the chair, and throwing it on. I know if I don't go that he'll just sit in front of me all night and whine like a little girl about me going. "If I go, will you shut up?"

He runs a hand through his short blonde hair as he replies, "Sure thing, anything to get you to come out. There's going to be a lot of hot girls there tonight, and I want you to meet someone."

Oh great. Any girl of his is nothing but trouble.

I learned the hard way last time, when he introduced me to this pretty, but crazy as hell girl that I made out with at a party. She pretty much stalked me for a month, calling me every day, showing up at my house, and even my workplace. I swear, it felt like a year of sleeping with one eye open.

Hell, I still worry sometimes. You don't hear of too many guys getting raped, but I'm not taking the chance.

Mentally preparing myself for the night, I grab my keys and head for the door. "Come on, douche," I call out to Brendon then look over at Roxy. "Thanks Roxy, we won't be out long."

She whips her red hair around her shoulders. "Sure," she answers then lays down and covers her face. "Just wake my ass up when you get back."

She looks super thrilled tonight. She must be fighting with her boyfriend again, or maybe it's just PMS.