BITE ME ➼ C. G. 〖 #wattys2016 〗

Chapter 30

Apologies for the last craptastic chapter. I will probably revise everything over the summer, but I think you guys will feel more satisfied with this book after the next few chapters.

Thanks for sticking with me, all you fluff nuggets! I was really scared that a bunch of people would stop reading after the last chapter, but I dunno. I guess I'll have to wait and see how many people actually jump off after this ☺️

Anyway...

SOTC: Hollow by Tori Kelly
• I'm paper thin, and you, you make me whole again •

I woke with my hat knocked off onto the bedspread, and my mind as still as a windless ocean. Thoughts began to stir up, miscellaneous wanderings about Kee and how much I missed the baby back ribs Mom had made for my tenth birthday.

Like a pre-programmed robot, I brushed some hair out of my face and swept the hat up, straightening it on my head. I caught a glimpse of my hand, half-moon scabs of fingernails. I recalled the feeling of Jessie clenching my arm, digging into my skin with her nails. I felt the wrenching pull over and over again, like the motion was trapped inside me. The dark memories from the night before began to encroach on my consciousness, and then the gears clicked.

I remember when I was shot three years ago, and the unbelievable slap of pain that sliced through my middle. I remember the shock that ricocheted down to my toes, and the splotchy blackness on my retinas that bore a resemblance to finger paint.

All of this came back to me. The pain, the shock, the smudges. Everything flickered and changed shape like sunspots. A whirling pull of dizziness made me crash back onto my bed, but the ceiling kept spinning.

Kee was gone.

Everything seemed so surreal: the bullet tearing through her skin, the muted screams, the warm, syrupy blood running into cold walker flesh on her sheets.

I remember watching the spider-like fingers groping at her, and how I didn't even bat them away. She could be a walker at this point. Or maybe she'll turn at the end of her pre-existing countdown.

Why did this even happen? I would have gladly taken the bullet for her. Bite me, I had told her. Kill me so I can be with you, instead of being left behind.

I screamed between my teeth, then smacked my fists into a pillow. The anger, the frustration, it all bubbled up in me. Why why why, the thoughts kept repeating. I closed my eyes and watched Kee falling backward into the street, over and over like clockwork.

Then I steeled myself. I had to read her letter. Maybe she'll answer some questions.  Maybe it'll make me feel better. The envelope sat innocently on my nightstand, a slight bulge in the middle.

I took it gingerly in my hands, then used my index finger to tear the flap open.

You got this, I told myself, but I had that numb, trembling feeling in my bones.

Inside the envelope was a bundle of post-it notes, scrawled over with dark blue lettering. I let the empty envelope fall onto the bedspread — this was all she had left behind, ink and paper.

I picked up the first post-it in the pile, which was a rosy pink, the color of Kee's chap-cracked lips.

I don't doubt you're sad right now. Don't try to be manly or anything, I can tell you're crying. That's okay, I understand.

That's the thing though, she understood too well. And now I don't have anybody like that.

I took the next post-it, a teal-colored one, a couple shades lighter than the envelope.