Friends after all - Dean Winchester x Reader

Chapter 21

"S-Sam!" you laughed as he escorted you once again home "Are you ever going to stop pointing it out?" you asked, pouting slightly and he chuckled.

"Absolutely not! As if I can ever forget how you cute you are when you're blushing." he chuckled, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

You bit your lower lip, averting your eyes to the ground but could hardly keep the smile off, just like he couldn't.

"You love embarrassing me, don't you?" you grumbled slightly and he smiled even more.

"Oh only when you blush, or stutter, or look away shyly or-"

"Sam!" you exclaimed, hitting his shoulder hard and he laughed at you.

"Ok ok sorry, I take it back. I take it all back... except for the fact that you are cute when you blush." he added laughing and you squeaked.

"I absolutely hate you." you groaned and he laughed more.

"I have realized that very much." he laughed and you giggled.

"Sam?" you breathed out and he hummed, tilting his head to the side.

"Thank you." you whispered and he smiled shyly at you.

"(Y/n) I've told you before. You don't have to thank me about anything. I am having just as much fun as you." he shrugged and you shook your head, taking a step closer to him. You still had to look up at him.

"Tonight- it was beyond amazing Sam and we didn't even have to go to some super fancy restaurant. But it was fantastic, I finally laughed for real and all that because of you. Because you were there." you took hold of his hand and Sam would be lying if he said his breath didn't catch on his throat.

"(Y/n)-" but you didn't let him say more.

"You have no idea- you have no idea how long it's been Sam. To finally feel relieved, like I don't have something to worry about, like... I don't have to pretend anymore Sam. For the first time I didn't have to... put on a fake smile and say I am fine. For the first time in such a long while I actually felt... good, Sam. With myself at that." you ended up whispering, your eyes casted down to your hands as Sam gave you a firm squeeze.

You didn't say it clearly, you didn't say what all this time had been burdening you. What, even if you wanted to be happy, always managed to make you sad. What turned all those smiles into fake ones. But it felt good to at least be able to say that things had changed. It made you feel a little guilty but at the same time you had never been selfish. Always putting others' needs – Dean's mainly – before yours. It was time to care a little about yourself when he seemed to care so little.

"You deserve to be happy, (Y/n). You don't have to thank me for treating you the way you deserve."

A smile played on your lips "See that's the thing about you. That's the thing that makes me wanna keep saying thank you to no end while you deny it. You think I truly deserve all those things Sam and that's- that's the kindest someone has ever been to me."

He shook his head, his lips pursed "You just find it hard to believe how you really deserve this and so much more. (Y/n), Ishould be the one to thank you non-stop for every amazing night or day we've spent together."

"Yeah but-" you breathed out a chuckle "-These weeks have been the hardest of my life, Sam. I've been through hard moments but these weeks far surpass them. Mary and-" a lump formed on your throat "-and Dean were a constant in my life. I guess taking them for granted was a stupid decision from the very beginning. And these weeks have proven to how hard it can be. I sometimes thought how it would be if I didn't have you here to take my mind of things and offer me the comfort I need... " you laughed humorlessly, looking up at him "I'd go crazy without you Sam." you had never been more honest in your life before.