Last Night Alone { Human! Five Nights At Freddy's }

Talking Through The Pain

        Goldie lifted me from my spot on the ground. Closing his arms around me and carrying me over to one of the chairs. Freddy was gone.
        My body ached all over as it shook. I wasn't scared of Freddy. But rather his losing himself. Me losing him. I care too much. Despite what he just did..
        There has to be more to the story. He wouldn't have just hit me...
        "Lilith? A-are you okay?" Goldie asked once he had me sitting down.
        I choked out my words after what seemed like minutes of just sitting there, trying to form words, "Y-yeah. I am.. J- just shocked.." I wiped away my tears, looking towards the door.
        "You aren't going after him..." Goldie stood in front of my gaze, blocking it from the door.
        "Goldie, please... I have to know if he meant it." I locked my gaze onto his. My blue eyes staring into his golden ones.
        "Only if I go with you..." He tried to bargain with me.
        "No.. I have to go alone. Please Goldie.." I muttered softly, as tears still flowed down my face. His features growing blurry. It looked like he was frowning at me, but I could be wrong.
        "Lilith..." He sat down next to me and hugged me. I buried my face in his shoulder, crying gently into it, grasping the fabrics of his shirt in my hands.
        The more I thought about Freddy the more I cried. And when I tried to not think of him, it didn't work and I ended up thinking of him even more. His voice. His face. His smirk. His smile. His eyes. His everything... haunts me.
        There's only one way to deal with it and that's to get him to talk to me and tell me if he meant what he did. If he really wanted to slap me. Or if it was an accident and he let anger control him. If its the second I'll forgive him and pretend it never happened. I have to. I wouldn't be able to wake up everyday thinking he hates me. Thinking that he wanted to hurt me.. So if he tells me that he meant it... I don't know what I'll do. I really don't. It will probably kill me, honestly.
        "P-please Goldie." I quietly begged the golden haired boy sitting beside me.
        He was silent for a few minutes, which worried me. But finally he answered me, "..Fine. But leave if he looks like he's going to hit you again." He spoke in a stern, but soft voice, that enclosed me in warmth.
        "Fine." I pulled back, wiping my tears away again.
        "Promise me, Lilith. Promise me you will leave if he gets violent." He grabbed my hands and held them in his surprisingly warm ones.
        "I promise, Goldie." I swore as I removed my hands from his and stood up, brushing my hands on my skirt. I took a few steps towards the door before turning back to him, smiling grimly at him, "Thank you..." And with that I ran out of the room, feeling his golden eyes on me as I left.
        I didn't know which way Freddy had gone so it was just a game of hide and seek. But a more intense one with lots to be at risk. I thought about which way I would go if I were him, and went the opposite way. So I went left from the office doors.
        I don't know why but him being so unpredictable... It makes sense that he would do what you didn't expect.. From there I walked down the darkened halls, looking into every room. Listening with my ears, trying to hear him if he was making noises. But nothing was heard and I couldn't see him in any of the rooms.
        I sighed turning into the girls washroom. I walked over to the sinks and looked in the mirror, frowning. I flipped the cold water on, letting it run for a few moments before sticking my hands under it and splashing my face. I looked back up in the mirror and noticed that there was someone in the stall behind me.
        I gasped turning around, about to make a run for it when I recognized the persons pants and shoes for Freddy's.
        "F-Freddy...?" My voice was quiet, almost weak sounding. The feet shuffled around but no movements were made to show that the person was coming out.
        I drummed my fingers against my hips for a few moments before walking forward and stopping in front of the door.
        "Freddy... I know its you in there." I knocked gently on the door with my knuckles.
        Again, there was no answer. I moved into the stall that was next to the one Freddy was in, and stood up on the toilet seat, peering down into the next stall.
        "Freddy." I bit on my lip as he looked up to see me, anger faded from his face, turned to pain and hurt. His eyes were slightly red and puffy, telling me that he had been crying. I felt facial features melt into concerned features.
        "Lilith... You need to leave." He motioned to the door, with a voice that was quieter than my own.
        "No Freddy. I'm not leaving you... We need to talk. Open up, please.." I watched as he looked down and then over at the lock on the door. He shook his head, brown hair falling over his face.
        "No Lilith. I might hurt you.." His voice was shaky, not strong like it usually was.
        It wasn't very often that I saw Freddy in a weakened state and it made me wonder if the others have ever seen Freddy at his breaking point or if they ever tried to help him when they thought he was upset. Did he ever even seem upset to them? Maybe he played it off as anger so well that they couldn't tell he was actually hurting.
        "I need to know Freddy. Did you mean it?" My voice cracked at the end of my sentence, my breath my shaky. It was obvious that I was nervous about his reply.
        "Lilith..." He looked back up at me, his brows furrowed in concern, "Of course I didn't. I- I can't be controlled. I just hurt people. You can't get close to me. I'll just hurt you more."
        "No, you won't." I shook my head, "You'll hurt me by leaving me. By pushing me away. That's whats going to hurt me the most. Can't you see how much I care? I wouldn't lie to you. I will always be honest with you. Let me show you, Freddy. Let me show you that people can care about you, even after they have been hurt by you." I reached my hand down into the stall, waiting for him to take it. But he just moved back, away from my hand.
        "You're better off without me." He whispered in a cold tone.
        "Haven't you been listening to me?!" I screeched. He looked up at me in surprise. Shock was clear on his face. "I need you Freddy! I- don't push me away. Don't lock me out of your life. I'm begging you. Please." Tears flowed down my face. "Don't do this to me. We- we're friends. I trust you, you're so important to me! And yet, you keep pushing me away when I know you care about me too!" I shook my head, wiping my cheeks with the palm of my hand. "Its not right Freddy. Its not-" I felt my knees start to go weak and I knew it was because Freddy was hurting me- not physically but mentally. And I knew that.
        "Lilith I- I don't know what I'll do if I hurt you again. I can't trust myself around you!" He shook his head once again, "You don't get it. You just- I can't deal with knowing that I'm the reason you were hurt."
        "You have to face it. Face it and move on, its the only way to deal with it. You need to trust me. Let me in. Literally and metaphorically speaking." I motioned to the door. When it didn't seem like Freddy was going to open it I moved down off the toilet seat and got down on the ground, crawling underneath the space between the stall wall and floor.
        "What are you doing?" Freddy asked nervously, I chuckled and pushed myself into his stall.
        "Breaking into your stall because you wouldn't open the door..." I paused for a moment, staring into Freddy's blue eyes, wide with fear.
        "Relax.. You won't hurt me.. see..." I placed my hand gently on the side of his face. I felt him flinch and then go stiff beneath my hand. I slowly moved my hand and trailed it down to his chest, resting it right over his heart. And then from there I smiled at him, "See? Its okay.." I placed my other hand on his shoulder and then wrapped both my arms around his neck, bringing him closer for a hug. I didn't feel him hug me back right away, he waited at least a minute it seemed before I felt his hands trail around my waist, hugging me back. His head lowered and rested on my shoulder, his body pressed right against mine. Which meant he was probably still upset. As was I. But like I said.. We just have to face it, acknowledge it, and move on.
        "I-I'm sorry Lilith.." He choked out, shoulders shaking a little as if he was nervous.
        "Shh... Its okay Freddy. I forgive you." I smiled softly, face pressed to his chest.
        It was clear that Freddy wasn't one for apologizing. I doubted that it was something he did very often, if he ever did at all. It seemed like he was too strong a person to admit when he was wrong or when it was he who was at fault. So it wouldn't really be surprising to learn I was the first he apologized to. Though he has probably said it at least once to someone at sometime..
        "Thank you.. for giving me another chance." Freddy chuckled, arms tightening around me, "I know I probably don't deserve it after the way I treated you back there. I just-.... I just didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to believe that I could have a family again... my mom always said it was just me. I didn't want to think that she could have lied to me like that. Sure she told me little lies, like Santa Claus and such but never anything like that... We were close. I remember that much about her. Not much else..."
        "Well maybe she didn't want you to know about your brother. I'm sure she had a reason to keep it from you.. And you better believe that you can have a family again, because that's what Goldie is by blood, and what I am by heart. And its also what the others are." I smiled, pulling back from the hug to look into his eyes once again, "And don't you dare forget it."
        The corners of his mouth tugged up into a smile, "I won't. Promise." He chuckled, unlocking the door and stepping out with me, his arm wrapped around my waist.
        "So...." I looked around where we were. "Why were you hiding in the ladies washroom?"
        Freddy chuckled, turning to look at me, "Well I didn't think you would check in the ladies washroom to find me. And I was right. I just forgot that you're a girl and would probably come in here for other things..."
        I laughed, dumbfounded by how he forgot I was a girl, "Forgot I was a girl? Well I didn't think I was that flat-chested." I said, faking an offended tone.
        Freddy smirked, "Oh you aren't-" He paused and looked down at my chest, "Yeah, no, you aren't flat-chested. I don't know how I missed out on that important little detail, actually.."
        I opened my mouth slightly in surprise and then giggled quietly, playfully shoving his shoulder, "Cute." I grinned, as we walked out into the halls, like nothing just happened. As if Freddy hadn't just slapped me. As if I hadn't almost lost him. As if I wasn't so close to falling apart inside. I smiled through it. And so did he.
        We just talked through the pain. That we both had.
        But scars heal, and I know with time and friendship, this scar will also heal. As long as nothing else comes and rips it open again.
        Because one can only be hurt so much, before they realize that its better to just be alone, that way they won't be hurt by people.
        I don't know what the others will say when they find out... they won't take it well, that's for sure. They flipped at Goldie for almost getting me hurt by someone else. I can only imagine what they'll do... But no matter what they say or do I'll stand by Freddy and make sure that they don't harm him.
        I would do the same if one of them were to have hurt me instead of Freddy. I would stand by them, even if it did hurt. I hope they understand that its not really his fault..
        He didn't mean to slap me.
        I'm sure it'll be fine.
        It has to be. I can't handle any more fights today...
        Not after all of that. It was hard enough dealing with the first fight between everyone and Goldie. And then Goldie and I with Freddy. And then Freddy and I again. Its too much fighting for one day.. For the most part, they were stupid fights that could have been avoided but weren't. I know that they aren't used to people caring about them and that they probably aren't used to caring like this, and that's probably one of the reasons that there has been so many fights.
        But the fights need to stop eventually if we are to all live together as one big, happy group.

        And although something in my mind tells me that the happiness won't last long, I still want to cherish every moment of it.
        Before something comes in and smashes all we know and believe.