Patrick Stump and the Flying Car Brigade

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

My friend Tyler once said that you'll never know the freakshow sitting next to you, but I don't think that applies if your entire neighbourhood is a freakshow. There was Aberforth Dumbledore, who lived across the street and had bright blue eyes, stringy grey hair, and a creepy obsession with goats, along with a guy who lived next door and wore a chiffon skirt. I was always telling Brendon not to make bets with him. He usually ignored me and then lost, but he made those high heels work. Finally, there was the man who looked a little bit like Edgar Allan Poe and almost certainly had a sweater fetish. If crazy equals genius, then my neighbours were rocket scientists.

Therefore, when someone purchased the house next door to us, it wasn't that much of a surprise. They couldn't possibly be weirder than the people that already lived here.

I'll never forget the morning when they arrived in Hogsmeade. I couldn't sleep in the wake of Saturday, so I was up early, and I spotted our new neighbours moving their bags into the house. I wasn't able to get a close look at them, but they appeared to be young. In fact, they probably weren't much older than I was. I tried to block out all of the noise coming from outside by turning on a mix of my favorite artists (an odd combination of David Bowie, Elvis Costello, Green Day, Michael Jackson, and whatever else I felt like at the moment), but that didn't work. I could still hear the blokes outside talking about how this mirror wasn't big enough for the two of them and how scary teenagers were, both topics I frankly didn't care at all about. I turned up the music as loud as it would go, but even that didn't work. I was kind of glad for the noise though, because when the city goes silent, the ringing in my ears gets violent. The voices outside seemed oddly familiar, but I couldn't quite place them.

I spent most of that morning blasting my music and attempting to start on my summer reading. My parents had an extra copy of A Guide To Advanced Transfiguration, so I started reading that, but I got bored to death quickly.

That afternoon, my mum entered my room. "Hi Mum," I said, still trying to read. "What is it?"

"Patrick, the new neighbours are throwing a party," she said. "Your dad and I are both going, and you can come if you're not too busy with your schoolwork."

I was ready to be done with my Transfiguration reading, and I genuinely did want to meet the neighbours, so I said, "Of course I'll come." I adjusted my glasses, ran downstairs, and went out the door.

It seemed like the entire neighbourhood had come to the party. Aberforth had decided to show up, along with one of his goats, and I spotted Ray Toro as well. He lived down the street from us. All of a sudden, I heard someone call my name. I turned around and saw who my new neighbours were.

Holy smokes. It was Frank Iero and Gerard Way.

The two of them had graduated from Hogwarts two years previously, and now they lived here, next door to me. "I didn't know that Patrick lived here," Frank said to Gerard.

"Me neither," Gerard said.

"Hi Frank. Hi Gerard," I said, smiling. "It's so good to see you."

"It's nice to see you too," Frank said as one of his many dogs ran up to him and licked his leg.

"How have things been for you?" I asked.

"Pretty odd," Gerard answered. "Frank and I went on a trip around the world last year, and then we decided to buy a house together. I'm still drawing cartoons for the Quibbler."

"That sounds really nice," I said.

"It's great," Gerard said, "and it's all because I have my Frankie."

Frank smiled and gave Gerard a quick peck on the lips. "Well, the only hope for me is you, Gee," Frank said. Their relationship was adorable, and it reminded me of how I felt when I was around Pete. I hadn't seen him a lot this summer, and I couldn't wait until I saw him again at Hogwarts. Frank then turned around and looked at me. "I wish we could keep chatting, but we have to meet everyone else," he said.

"Wait a second," Gerard said. "I have a gift for Patrick." He took out a blank piece of parchment and handed it to me. "This is yours now. Take good care of it, remember to say 'Mischief Managed' when you're finished, and take this to your grave."

"Um...okay?" I said, a little bit confused. Why would I want a blank piece of parchment? Nevertheless, I took the gift, and brought it inside with me, still wondering why Gerard had given this to me.

I was distracted by my parents, who were sitting at the table in the dining room. "Patrick, we need to talk to you," my dad said. I folded up the parchment, stuffed it into my pocket, and sat down at the table, preparing myself for whatever my parents were going to say.