"I can still hear his screams! It's all I hear and it just gets louder and louder until I can't tell if they're his screams or my own! I just need it to stop! Please just make it stop."
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5 things you can see.
4 things you...
Chrysalism: The amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a thunderstorm.
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The house was quiet. Not quite eery yet not exactly comforting either. My brothers had left early this morning to run an errand that they couldn't tell me about which I found strange but didn't really question. My mom was spending the day in the kitchen, baking and cleaning, the usual stuff that she does every Saturday. Of course my dad was at work. He was at work more often than not lately. I'd just gotten off the phone with Officer Tommy. We'd discussed how I was adjusting and he filled me in on what was new back home which wasn't much. It was nice to talk to him but after hanging up I felt a little sad. Being away from him and from my hometown was still hard. I went from seeing him everyday to talking to him on the phone maybe twice a week, but I was managing the best I could.
Sitting in the bay window in the living room and watching the sky brought me some peace. The sky was grey and I could see dark clouds forming not too far off. With the window cracked open I can smell the rain coming and it made me feel at ease. I love everything about rain. I especially love the thunder that comes with it. I like the way it echoes across the sky, demanding to be heard. As if there's someone I can't see was watching over and yelling at us down here on Earth. Lightning was already flashing in the distance. It put my mind at ease and my thoughts floated to where I would be if things had turned out differently.
I'd be back home, most likely with him, at his house or mine. We would probably be messing around with my guitar or battling each other on various xbox games. Maybe we'd talk about the girls we never had a shot with or even joke about crazy family members, not a care in the world. Our school work would sit in our backpacks, neglected until the last possible moment. Maybe some of our other friends would be with us, lounging about as always. Noah would still be away at university, enjoying his life and only feeling obligated to visit during the holidays. Nathan would probably be off traveling the world like he'd always wanted to do. Mom would be enjoying her day off, probably being annoyed at us for making too much noise. And dad well, he would still be at work.
That's how things should've been. I shouldn't be sitting here, staring out the window, silent and lost in the depths of my own mind. Noah shouldn't have had to defer from his degree to come help out at home; Nathan shouldn't have given up his dream, though he claims he'll get there someday, just to keep an eye on me; mom shouldn't have taken leave from her job to take care of me and dad should be working at the company's main office instead of the smaller branch he's at now. It's all my fault and I'm painfully aware of all they have given up for me and most times the guilt is unbearable. They swear that they made their decisions out of their own free will but I know better. I love my family for everything they've done for me but sometimes I think they're better off without me.
My attention was pulled to the front door swinging open abruptly. Laugher filled the room as three figures shook off the rain that had begun to drench the town just moments ago. Nathan and Noah stood before me with the widest smiles I've ever seen and I'm sure mine perfectly mirrored theirs when I laid eyes on the third person in the room.
