The Wondrous Pain of Letting Go

15. Collapse

It's been a long time since I've been in the hospital and not been a patient. I've come to the realization that waiting rooms were invented by the devil. The atmosphere is filled with thick tension and anxiety and it's honestly the least comfortable feeling I've ever experienced. The chairs are definitely not comfortable. We've only been sitting here for about 20 minutes, but it feels like hours.

I look to my left to see Hennessy sitting with a calm expression, but I know my the way she's gripping my hand that she's anything but. On my right Oli is sitting with his knee shaking steadily. You can practically see the anxiety radiating from the three of us. We called Jake's dad but he didn't answer so Assistant Coach Ericson went back with Jake. We still don't know what's wrong with him.

"This is ridiculous." Oli huffed.

"Oli! Nessy! Where is he? Where's Jake?" Jake's little brother Ryan came running into the waiting room breathing hard.

Oli was immediately on his feet, wrapping his strong arms around Ryan who looked like he was about to have a panic attack.

"Jake is still with the doctors, we haven't been here long. I thought you weren't at the game?"

"I wasn't but my friend Amy was and she texted me what happened so I ran all the way here from Toby's house." Ryan huffed.

"Okay well why don't you just take a seat and wait with us." Hennessy said softly.

Ryan took the seat beside me that Oli was sitting in before and slumped down, head in his hands.

"You're Nick right?" he asked me without looking up.

"Yeah."

"Is my brother going to be okay?"

I was taken aback by his question. Why ask me of all people?

"Jake says you're a good person and I don't know you well enough to know if you're telling me a lie. So I'm asking you to tell me if my brother is going to be okay." he sighed.

I understood what he wanted from me. He wanted to be reassured without feeling patronized. I can relate to that feeling.

"Your brother is going to be just fine." I placed my hand on his shoulder and I felt him relax a bit.

It was another 20 minutes before Coach Ericson came out, a look on his face that I can only describe and confusion and anger.

"Coach." Oli stood up and the rest of us followed.

"Hey kids. Ryan is your father here?" he looked around.

"No, should he be?"

"Well yeah we've been trying to reach him." he looked perplexed.

"Is my brother okay?" Ryan all but shouted.

"Yeah. You can go see him. Down that hall, room 62." Coach turned to us and I knew what he was gonna say wasn't going to be good.

"He's got a very minor concussion from the hit but that's not what the main issue is here. Did you guys know his ribs were broken?"

"What? No! When did he break his ribs?" Oli asked, a look of confusion passing between us.

"He said he didn't know they were broken. Said that he fell down the stairs the other day and must've done it then."

"OK. So then what's wrong?" Hennessy asked.

"The doctor said that the bruising isn't consistent with a fall. He said that someone had to have beat the crap outta him and when we asked Jake about it he insisted that it was an accident, nothing but a fall so either he's lying to us or this doctor isn't very good at his job." he ran a hand through his hair with a sigh.

I looked at Hennessy and a horrible feeling formed in my heart.

"What's that look? What do you guys know?" Coach demanded.

"What? Nothing. We don't know anything." Oli shrugged.

"Bull. You guys have exactly 5 seconds to tell me what's going on."

All three of us instinctively took a step closer together and I grabbed Hennessy's hand. Either we betray Jake's trust and tell coach about his dad or we lie and let things continue going on. A moral dilemma at its finest. Neither Oli nor Hennessy looked like they were going to speak up anytime soon so I cleared my throat and prepared to do what I thought was right. 

"It was his dad. He gets angry sometimes. Jake didn't want anyone to know." I whispered the last part.

We watched Coach's jaw work as he tried to find something to say. We waited but he said nothing. Instead he just up and walked down a hall pulling out his phone. Oli, Hennessy and I stood there for a few more moments and when it was clear he wasn't going to return we silently walked towards Jake's room. He was laying on the bed, arms wrapped tightly around Ryan who seemed to be trying not to cry.

"Hey guys." He smiled when we entered.

"How are your ribs?" Oli said emotionlessly.

"Coach told you." It wasn't a question and Jake sighed. "It's nothing. I'm fine."

"Bullshit it's nothing! Goddammit Jake!" Oli slammed his hand on the wall and everyone visible jumped at his outburst.

"What's going on?" Ryan asked. He was scared.

"Nothing's going on kid. Everything's fine." His face was stoic and his shoulders tense. "What did Coach tell you?"

"He said that you have a minor concussion and that your ribs are broken. Said that you said its from falling down the stairs but then the doctor called bullshit on that so he asked us if we knew anything." Oli shrugged.

"And what did you tell him?"

"The truth."

Jake's eyes widened and his whole body tensed up like he was a bomb about to explode.

"Get. Out." He said through clenched teeth.

"Jake w--" Hennessy tried but she was cut off.

"I SAID GET OUT." Jake screamed.

My hands instantly went up to cover my ears. I watched as Jake's breathing grew heavier. His eyes showed betrayal and hurt and I knew it was all my fault. Oli stormed out of the room and Hennessy gently grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door. My heart clenched when I saw the tears rolling down her face so I pulled her into a tight hug. We royally fucked up.