Inception ➳ Niall Horan

[iii] belief

                [iii]
             [niall] [June 2, 2014] 

           “So you say the grave wasn't there, huh?” I nodded, frustrated. By the tone Liam spoke in, he completely obviously thought I was either joking, or had lost my mind. He wasn't taking this seriously but that's alright, since I still have to explain everything. My hands went around the warm mug which contained freshly brewed tea. I reckon this can calm me down a little. I watched as Faith listened to the conversation while preparing food and I was honestly waiting for her to talk. I think I could consider her thoughts on this. “That's not possible, Niall.” Liam shook his head.

          “Stop being in denial for a second and just consider it?” Faith rolled her eyes, placing plates in front of us as the appetizing fragrance of pasta lingered around in the kitchen. “Do you think we both are crazy?” Liam sighed.

          “I'm trying to be logical, okay?” He shrugged, picking a fork from the stand and stabbing the pasta with it. With hunger causing my stomach to grumble, I did the same. “You claim you saw Amber. And Niall claims the grave isn't there at all. Do you know how stupid that sounds? Excuse me but it isn't my fault if I'm thinking like the general population. I need more convincing. And you both need more proofs too, these two aren't going to make you look sane out there.” As much of a rude arse he sounded right now, he was right. We'd probably look like mental patients, and get sent for treatment. Everyone knows Amber isn't there anymore, well at least I guess she isn't.

         I don't even know what to think anymore.

       The thought that she might be alive somewhere. .  doesn't make me happy or excited. It makes me afraid, and scared. Because I know the possibilities are endless and I'll just go back to being even more worse than I was before if I come to know nothing we contemplated is true. Though I would still ask for explanations about everything that happened. 

      These two months haven't exactly been easy. I'd say I wasn't dating Amber for a long, long time unlike Liam and Faith. It was for eight months, but I was expecting so much more from it. A lot actually. I pictured us to be together for years, I had fallen hard for her. And then you can't expect me to be all happy and smiles in a few days after she's just. . . snatched away from me.

        I didn't cry all the time, or sulk around, or maybe lock myself in a room and things like that. I still try to be as happy as possible since the tour has now started. But there are these moments were I'm just sitting in the flat, and memories just pour down and wreck my brain like a fucking rainstorm. I promised myself I wouldn't have any stage breakdowns, and the exact thing happened. Now I don't know if I can depend on anything I say to myself.

        “I'm scared,” Faith was sinking into the chair, looking like she'd genuinely prefer going invisible right now. I would probably want the same. Considering Liam thinks we're just really deluded, the rest of the boys can think so to. And we don't want that. I've come to a realization that this a sensitive topic. For me, and for Faith. What are we going to do if we don't have the boys' support? “You don't believe a single word I say, do you?” Her eyes were glossy and I knew how it was like for her. Helpless. Liam shook his head with a long sigh.