I could just kill myself and no one would care or notice. Well, they say that they care but it's all just a lie in the end. If they truly cared, where were they when I was crying at night? Where were they when I was bleeding from my arms and thighs? Where were they if they truly cared?
Probably at home, watching Netflix. At a friend's house, playing video games. At a party, getting drunk. Out on a date with their crush or lover. So did they really care at all?
No, they didn't. They all saw how I was when they talked about food; quiet, uncomfortable, nervous. They saw fresh cuts on my arms whenever the sleeves fell down, but never said anything. They saw the bags under my eyes.
I didn't want attention - I didn't want everyone to know. I just needed to know if I had anything to stay alive for. Someone had a sister. Someone had a best friend. Hell, someone had their pet.
I had spent my last three or four years believing no one cared. I didn't know why I was still alive, I had no reason. I had nothing.
Sixteen years old... I had lived long enough. No one would care anyway. I could probably get kidnapped and everyone would just continue with their lives.
This is what went through my head as I stared out my window on second floor. I glanced at the rain drops making puddles on the asphalt. Then I moved my attention to the dark night sky, skies covering most of the stars.
Suddenly something caught my attention; a person, barely visible in the rain and light from lamp posts. The person - pretty sure it was a guy - was moving towards my house. What? We weren't expecting anyone as far as I knew. I saw him stand by the front door for a second or two before the door opened and he stepped inside. The hell?
Then I heard a knock at the door. I didn't bother opening it or answering, I really didn't want to talk to anyone right now. But I was a little curious, of course. There was another knock. Silence. I jumped a little when the door opened and closed.
"Elijah?"
I knew that voice, so I turned my head to see none other than a dripping wet Noah. His jet black hair seemed darker and his normally light green jacket was darker. The front of his pants too, and his face. But his blue eyes were the same.
"What do you want?" I asked in a monotone voice.
"I was wondering how you're doing..."
I raised an eyebrow. "And you couldn't just send a message?"
"Well, yeah. But I kinda wanted to see you..."
"Why?"
"I missed you. Your face too. I just wanted to know if-"
I cut him off. "I'm fine. Was that the answer you were looking for? Well, you got it. Now you can go."
"But I really wanted you to know-."
"Please just leave..."
"I'm not leaving until I-."
"Go!"
"Will you just li-!"
"GET THE FUCK OUT!" I yelled as I stood up from the chair I was sitting on, taking three steps towards him so I was right in front of him.
"What's wrong?"
"P-Please just... Leave. Please..."
"I just want you to know something before I leave."
I met his eyes, and he continued. "I care about you. I do. I don't usually say it, but I do. We've been friends for seven years, of course I care..."
Did he really mean that? Did he really care? I didn't know what to believe. He didn't mean that. He didn't really care.
"You believe me, right?" Noah asked, breaking my thoughts.
I nodded.
"You do this funny thing with your eyes when you lie," Noah said. I was about to protest when he cupped my cheeks and leaned forward. I had no time to react before his lips were on mine. "Hmmph!" He pressed his lips harder on mine. What was happening.
He pulled back and leaned his forehead against mine, his cold and wet from the rain. "I care, I do, and I always have..."
Without knowing what the fuck was going through my mind I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. Noah kissed back instantly, walking us backwards to by bed where he sat down on the edge of my bed, our lips moving in sync. Noah pulled me onto his lap, my legs on either side of him. He then pushed his tongue inside my mouth, making me moan as I moved my tongue with his.
The room was filled with kissing sounds and breathing, moaning. I pushed Noah down onto the bed, grinding down on him. Noah made a pleased sound from the back of his throat and pulled back. I whined and leaned down to kiss him again but he sat up. I was still sitting on his lap.
"Do you believe me now? I care about you. Always have. I'm in love with you..."
Wait, what?
hope you liked it xP
