I Couldn't Tell

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Charlie Heetness; Me and him have been friends for two years. He's a year younger than me, but doesn't mean it looks that way. He's tall and thin, with a small amount of good muscles. He has that nice soft brown hair, thats natrually straight. Some people call him Justin Bieber because of his hair. There's times I'd laugh, but now it's just being ridiculous. He has a very good looking face, nice jaw and he has those tiny loop earings with a black ball in the middle of them. It looks nice on him, sometimes I have an urge to try and play with them. He has a goal, in which he told me; he'd protect me as a  friend untill he died. He always knew what to say to me, he's the most important person in my life. 

Now for me, I'm Jeydon Synner. I have high school, with Charlie obviously. Except, he's a Sophomore as I'm a Senior. So he's sixteen as I'm seventeen. He always used to complain about always dating seventeen year olds, which got me smiling but also sort of disappointed. I'm much shorter than him, but also pretty thin, just thin; no muscles what so ever. I have brown hair as he does, but not natrually straight, so it's difficult. I have hair sorta like Charlie's, but a little longer, but now I dyed it black. Also another thing, I'm gay and Charlie doesn't know, neither does he know; that I might be in love with him. 

I'm afraid to admitting the news, but it's normal, isn't it? He always talks about girls, he's even with a girl right now; Ashley Ghale. Not that she's bad, but they started dating three weeks ago, and I haven't been seeing him at all lately. It's actually kinda getting on my nerves a bit.

"Jeydon? Are you alright?" I snapped out of my thoughts and looked at Kareesa. Which is my close bestfriend, everyone has those; it's nothing new. She also knows about my gayness, but she's the only one that knows.

I nodded and looked down, resuming playing with my peas on my lunch tray, "I'm just upset and disappointed."

I know it's not like me and Charlie aren't together or anything, but I know our friendship atleast matters. He put all the effort into the care in our friendship, and then he decided to let it all go. Is his relationship with his girlfriend that serious? I haven't seen him and Ashley come to lunch. Maybe they got into trouble for sucking face. Wait, no. Now thinking about it started to have a weird pain in my chest. Also feeling sick wasn't a good sign either. 

I heard her sigh, "Come on, Jeydon. Don't give me the quiet food playing. Is it Charlie?" I guess when I was thinking deeply, I didn't realize she was trying to talk to me.

I didn't want to say anything. I'll be to afraid to say to much and I'll get myself angry. I don't want to hate on Charlie, but it's his choice for this. Unless his girlfriend is trying to control him. Fuck, I don't know.

She threw a pea at my nose, "Jeydon! Stop ignoring me!"

I wiggles my nose and rubbed it, "Gross! Sorry, I'm thinking a lot."

"You know you can tell me anything, is it about Charlie?" She has two fingers around a pea, but still layed on the plate. I think she was preparing herself to throw another one if I didn't answer.

I rolled my eyes and continued playing with the same pea. I didn't even eat my lunch. "It is, but I'm not sure if I want to talk about it. He just hasn't tried talking to me since he got with his girlfriend. I don't know if I'm as important to him." Then I thought of something. "Does he know I'm gay?" If he did, I'm going to go crazy.

Her eyebrows narrowed, "I don't think so. If he knew, I doubt he'd have a problem. He never mentioned about gay people. Maybe you should just talk to him. Him and his girlfriend are just to connected, I'm sure they're just serious about eachother."