Notice Me! (A Conor Maynard AU Fan Fiction)

Chapter 26 - The Girl

Sam’s POV

I didn’t need his approval.  I didn’t even need to tell Conor what I was planning on doing. Why did I think it would solve anything? I know I’ve tried to ruin his relationship but how would you feel if you fell for a girl who just chose your brother a couple of days later without saying sorry or anything?  I’ve given up on that now, I gave it a few tries and they only got stronger as a couple and hated me more so it’s time I just forgot about them and tried to find someone. Zack and Olivia were becoming couple of the year, it was sickly sweet but they look so happy. I want to look happy. When I woke up this morning I told Conor that my life didn’t revolve around him and Beth anymore, I was living for myself and I was sorry for what I’d done to them. I had found someone and I was going to tell her my feelings this morning at school. He just looked me up and down and carried on getting ready. I’ve obviously affected him more than I thought. Making my way into school I saw Beth talking to one of the popular girls. This really had changed her, the girl who used to be a nobody, blended into the background of everything. I quickly pulled her to the side.

“Beth, look, I know I’ve been a complete dick trying to break you guys up but I need you to see it from my perspective! I showed you signs I liked you and you jumped on my brother without a word. I’d rather you had told me.” I said quietly. I didn’t want anyone to hear me say ‘my brother’. She looked down at the floor guiltily but my conscience felt suddenly clearer.

“I know, Sam. I am sorry. It just happened; I barely had time to think about it. It was always going around in my head, I could see the hurt in your eyes but with Conor with me I didn’t feel I could say sorry to you, in case he thought we had something going on…” I nodded. I could see she was desperate for me to forgive her. “Mandy spoke to me and then I completely understood. Your actions weren’t wise but I knew why you did it.” She pulled me in for a hug and whispered another sorry in my ear. I felt better and less angry, it felt like my slate had been wiped clean. This was going to be the beginning of the new me! I said goodbye to Beth and began my trek around school to see the girl I wanted to spill my heart out to. Each corridor I walked down made me more nervous, I knew I was getting closer to her with each step. What if she didn’t like me? What if I say what I want to and she laughs in my face? I stormed into the library and looked around. She’s not in here… My body instantly slumped and I let out a huge sigh. Everything I had planned to say and got all excited to announce …

“What’s up with you?” I heard a familiar voice behind me and spun round quickly. Mandy stood before me with a huge smile on her face, which slowly faded when she saw my upset look. “Are you alright?” She asked, concerned.

“Yeah, its just been a weird start to my day… I wanted to go somewhere quiet to think everything through but the library is full!” I half-lied. I felt guilty but I could hardly tell her what I was doing in the library, a place I’d never been in to.

“Well, you can say no but I know a perfect place. It’s somewhere I go when I need some peace and quiet from life.” Her smile grew again and I could feel a smile appearing on my face.

“I would love that.” I said simply and she nodded, turning to walk to this place. We walked for a couple of minutes before we were outside, the netball/basketball courts were in front of us. I had no idea where she was taking me, I didn’t even think anything was behind this place! We walked around the courts and she stopped when we were behind them, a small grassy hill behind it. It was shaded by a large oak tree and the grass didn’t look damaged like it did across the field. We sat down on the mound and I stopped and listened. It sounded like school was so far away.

“This place is amazing!” I said in awe.

“Thank you!” Mandy giggled. She looked so sweet when she laughed. “I wanted to speak to you anyway! I wanted to hear how everything was since our chat! Have you spoken to that girl?” I looked down at the floor and rubbed the back of my head with my hand nervously.

“Well that day, when I got home, I spoke to Conor about it and he wasn’t very enthusiastic so I felt a bit down, I’ve spoken to her a little bit but I’ve not asked her out or even hinted at it. It’s scary!” it felt like a weight off my shoulders being able to open up to someone. “Zack was quite happy to give me advice but Conor just got into a shouting match with me about ruining relationships.” Mandy shook her head.

“Did you manage to speak to Beth?” She asked, her head tipped to the left slightly. It was weird being around someone who actually wanted to hear what I wanted to say. My mates were always more of the ‘I just want the gossip’ type. They liked me because I was popular, there was no other reason.

“Yeah, she said you’d told her about our conversation. She actually apologised to me!” Mandy’s eyebrows rose like she was shocked.

“That’s great! I just told her what I thought after you talked to me. I’m not going to lie; I thought you were just a crazy man but after having that chat with you I understood it from your point of view. I wanted them to know!” She let out a little embarrassed laugh. “I’m glad she saw it from our view.” Our view? Did she just say that?

“Well, I can’t thank you enough!” I said before I thought, quickly snapping my mouth shut and feeling embarrassed.

“Honestly, it’s no problem. I just like to hear both sides of the story before I make my decision.” She smiled at me. “And to be honest, I’m on your side. I know you did some bad stuff, but it was jealousy, grief and anger. I probably would have done the same! If I were you I would have punched the shit outta him!” She said humorously. I let out a small silent laugh.

“Well, I could hardly beat my brother to shit!” I said and slapped my hand over my mouth. Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. How stupid am I? Why can’t I keep my mouth shut?

“He’s your brother?” She whispered, barely able to believe it. I have to find a good way out of this.

“Yes, but you can’t tell anyone! Only like three people know… It’ll ruin both of us!” My palms were sweaty and I felt hot. Why did I always put myself in these positions?

“I won’t! I promise. I assume Olivia and Beth know though?” She looked a little upset at the fact they knew but she didn’t. I felt so bad for her. I would have told you, I promise!

“Yeah, but we only tell people that are going to be involved with us.” I said and I saw her body slump slightly. “Beth knew because of Conor, Olivia had to know when she started dating Zack and I’m telling you because I want to take you out at some point…” Her eyes lit up and she lifted her head, her eyes finally connecting with mine how they had when we had the chat outside of class.

“But what about the girl you like?” She said instantly, feeling bad. “I don’t want to ruin anything!” I let out a small laugh.

“You are the girl. I was too scared to tell you then. You’re one of the only people willing to listen to me, talk to me like a normal person and not like me just because I’m popular in this school.” I said honestly, my heart was beating rapidly and I felt sweaty. I hope she says yes. She stared blankly at me for a while, as if what I said was still sinking in.

“Yes.” She said suddenly, catching me off guard.

“What?”

“I’d love to go out with you at some point!” She said with a huge grin on her face.

“What? Really?” I said, shocked that someone actually wanted me for once. The only two people I had liked before her ended up with my brother.

“Of course! And don’t worry, Conor’s not my type.” She said as if she’d read my mind. I laughed and pulled her into a hug. Her perfume filled my nose and I finally felt a sense of protection, unlike the other girls she actually wants me.

“Thank you.” I said, knowing it was going to make me sound like an idiot. I just wanted her to know I wasn’t using her or anything. If Conor’s still feeling paranoid, he may try and ruin my relationship as much as I did for him. “Just be careful, I don’t know what Conor’s going to be like.”