Psycho

Day 12

I was unsure if Jason would visit me today, and I honestly wouldn't be surprised if he didn't. We both pushed and he obviously neither of us wanted to share too much. I guess it wasn't too good of an idea, but I couldn't help but continue to wonder about him. His life is so dangerous, different...interesting.

To my surprise, the door opened and in walked Jason with my breakfast. He set the tray down in front of me, before sitting at the end of the bed. I took my pill first, washing it down with the water. I picked up the piece of toast, then looked up at Jason when he wasn't saying anything. I raised my eyebrows, waiting for him to say something.

He shook his head. "Sorry, I'll just leave," he said, standing up.

"No wait!" I stopped him, a little too eager. He now raised an eyebrow at me before slowly sitting back down. I sucked in my lips a bit embarrassed. I didn't want to sound needy, even though at this point I depended on him. "Um...I'm sorry...about the idea yesterday. You're right, it was very childish."

Jason looked down, a small nod. "I want to know more about you too...but your questions can be..."

"Personal?" I finished, see it as predictable.

"Yeah, and then you don't want to answer my questions when you clearly know more about me. Neither of us want to dig into our pasts, it's better to keep it to ourselves."

"I guess...I've just always been curious. Part of the reason I wanted to go into psychology was because I liked getting into people's minds, know why they do what they do and why they are the way they are. Maybe my environment has changed, but I haven't," I defended my actions.

Jason just nodded, staring at me. "I think you've gotten in my head enough already...no need to push," he said sternly.

It was my turn to nod, understanding what he was saying. I still had one burning question though, one that was always in the back of my head. If I wasn't going to ask anymore questions, I would have to do it now. Or try.

"Can I just ask you one last question?" I dared.

Jason looked at me, not the least bit happy. But he didn't seem angry either. He sighed, "What?"

"Do you...care about people?" I asked, unsure if I should be blunt or not. I shook my head though, figuring I would regret it if I wasn't clear enough. "People like...me? Do you care about me?"

Jason looked shocked for a second, but masked it was his usual stern expression. :Of course not! What do you think I am?"

"Human?"

Jason shook his head, standing up now. "I'm leaving," he muttered.

"You didn't answer me!" I pointed out.

"Who said I have to answer to you?! You're under my roof! This is just another one of your bullshit questions, and I already said I'm done with those!" He snapped, making my eyes widen. It almost came out of nowhere, his anger. Although, that's kind of just how he is.

"You said I could ask you one last question!" I reminded him, trying not to raise my voice. I'm not an angry person, but that also had to do with my job. I didn't have that job anymore though, so did it really matter?

"I asked what your question was, I never said I would answer it!"

I huffed, rolling my eyes. "I just don't understand! You must care for me in the slightest amount! I've thought over hundreds of reasons why you would kidnap me and just keep me hostage, you must care for me! You did all that you could to keep me from starving myself, providing me with my needs, even saying that life will be better for me here! What other reason would you do that?" I screamed, unable to hold it in. I stood up and walked towards him. "Because let's face it; if you didn't care for me, you would've killed me a long time ago!" I lowered my voice, staring him straight in the eyes.

He kept his eyes locked on mine before quickly grabbing my arms. My eyes widened as reality struck and I grew fearful again. What had I just done? What was he going to do? Would he hurt me again?

"You think I care? The last time I cared for someone was when I had a family, and that time has been long gone! I don't care for people, and then you show up and try to help me...you want to help me, you keep pushing and pushing and...and..."

"A-and what?" I stuttered.

"And somehow you just keep making your way closer and closer..." his voice started to lower and he started to slow down. "You just won't stop...you won't stop being...different! And all that's going to do is get you in trouble. I can't let you in, I can't let you get close, and I definitely can't care about you!" He finished, letting me go by pushing me back a little. He turned around, making his way to the door. he stopped in his tracks as his hand reached for the knob. "I couldn't even if I wanted to...for your own good..." he finished softly. He finally opened the door and left as always.

I stood there, more confused than ever now. What did he mean he couldn't even if he wanted? For my own good? What did it all mean? And in some way...did that mean that he did care, or "wanted" to care about me? I took a step back, turning around and placing my hand on my head. Would I ever understand him or this life?

Woah, it's been a while! I'm so sorry, I'm not even going to start with excuses. I'm just sorry I haven't been posting much! I tried to give an interesting chapter in return, especially with how well this story is doing. I even almost added a kiss, but I didn't feel it was right at this moment. Don't worry though, I've got big plans for this story!