DESTINED TO BE HIS GARMENT

chapter 13

He sat in his ultra modern office deep in thought. It was bugging him. Drawing the blood out of his system just like a bed bug draws out blood from humans. He couldn't find peace. How could he when the thought of his wife wouldn't leave his mind? He didn't even want it to leave his mind. But he didn't also want to think of her in that manner. He was on edge. Frustrated and worried for his own marriage and the state of his heart. Because it seemed it was no longer working like it should.She was his wife, and he could think of her all he wanted. But this kind of thought wasn't helping his state of mind at all. His heart was in chaos. It was almost shattered. How could he have forgotten such an important information about his wife? He shouldn't have. He had raised his hopes so high and now that little piece of reminder has rendered him hopeless about the fruitfulness of their marriage and the chance of ever being happy with his wife. He needs his heart soothed, because it was in so much turmoil. So he started to recite verses from the Qur'an to help him do exactly that. He never knew he could love so intensely. About a month ago, if someone had told him he will love his wife that much, he would have mocked that person and called him or her a blatant liar. But he has fallen uncontrollably in love with his wife that, that little piece of information he had so carelessly forgotten has come back to hunt him.

That explains why, his wife seem to loathe him and everything about him just seems to disgust her. And most importantly, that was why she refused to be with him in the same room as all husbands and wives do. That was why she wouldn't even look at him. He was so sorry for her. He had taken away her chance of being happy. She had married him just to please and protect her family from embarrassment. Now he was absolutely sure.

But what could he do about it. Absolutely nothing. Nothing at all. The situation couldn't be helped. The damage has already been done. None can help except the Greatest of Helpers. He who brought them together in the first place and who knows what's best for them. But he felt guilty. Najwa being with him wasn't out of her own will but she was being pushed by something. The need to protect her family and cover up her sister's woeful attitude. Such that she abandoned her own quest for happiness in order to live with him as his wife instead of her sister. How can he look into her face now, considering the sacrifice she's made? If he could, he would just break off the marriage since there hasn't been any kind of consummation in order to prevent more hurts and pains. But his heart wouldn't allow him because he has learnt to love her so dearly. Maybe he was being selfish. But he doesn't want to let her go. He needed their marriage to work so badly just as much as he needed air to survive.

Najwa. His wife. His heart. The apple of his eye. She had gradually crept into an initially impenetrable space in his heart and taken control. She has become his queen even though she had no idea about it.

Three days ago, he had been enthusiastic about his sister's promise to help him work things out between him and his beloved Najwa. He had been anxious and the weekend couldn't come any earlier. He had been on cloud nine.

Just this morning as he arrived in school with her, his mood was still quiet a happy one and full of expectations. But on his way to his office, a single word managed to turn his world upside down. Just a word. From a student who was having a conversation he didn't know of with another. His ear couldn't be anymore inquisitive. And that brought all the problems. Just one word, 'unrequited'.

Where had it disappeared to? Was it because his ego had been too bruised by Salma he had forgotten his sister's words? Or was it that he had been falling so hard for his wife he had forgotten his sister had once said Najwa was suffering because of an unrequited love?

Subhanallah. Who was this man who had captured his wife's heart and rendered him useless as well in her life? What was he like? Was he better than him? How did Najwa meet him and where? What was it about him that intrigued his wife so much?