Bleeding Black and Gold (Bruins- Tuukka Rask)

Olympics, Part 4

~Wednesday, February 19 after the gold medal game~

Brianne, Jessie, Molly, and I trudge into the apartment and close the door. We stand there, our medals glinting around our necks, sending silver sparks dancing across the room. I look down at the beautiful medal, my first ever Olympic medal, and a tear streaks down my face, shimmering on the silver. My fingers curl around the silver circle that screams second place and not good enough at me. I press it to my forehead, and I let out a choked sound, more tears slipping from my eyes. Brianne, Jessie, and Molly don't do anything to comfort me. They stand there, numb and unfeeling, as my shoulders shake with the terrible burden of three goals let in on me. I sob until my eyes itch, until my nose is stuffed, until I can't catch my breath. 

A knock on the door makes all of us flinch, freeing us from the stupor we were in. I pull open the door, not even caring about my appearance, and see Tuukka. He wraps me in a tight hug, and I find new tears as I cry into his shirt. 

"Alex, it's okay, it'll be fine, don't worry." His hand smooths over my hair, rubbing my back, trying to calm me down. 

"It's not okay!" My voice bursts out of me in a crackling shout as I push Tuukka back. 

"I let in three goals! Three! We had the game in our hands, and I lost it!" I yell, my whole body shaking. 

"Alex, you can't blame yourself for that-" Jessie starts, but I cut her off. 

"Yes, I can. You can tell me over and over again that it's not my fault, I did noting wrong, but then who did? I'm not going to blame everyone else, nor let them take the blame for it! I messed up, and it's my fault we don't have gold medals in our hands right now!" My voice is strong even through the crying. 

"Alex, they were a better team," Brianne tries, but I shoot that down. 

"They weren't. We could have beaten them if I didn't lose my mind!" I wail. 

"Alex, we didn't. As much as it hurts, and the rest of us know how much it hurts to lose to Canada again, we can't go back and change it. The past is the past, let it be," Molly tells me, and her comforting yet sharp tone cuts right through me. 

"I'd say none of you know how this feels, but you do," I sniff, wiping my eyes and managing a small smile. 

"That's right," Tuukka says, putting his arm over my shoulders and giving me a reassuring squeeze. 

"I came so, so close to holding the Stanley Cup in my hands again last season, but your friends Patrick denied me that," Tuukka says, poking me in the stomach. I manage a small laugh as he does this, and I cheer up a little. 

"The first loss is always the hardest," Molly sighs, dropping a hand on my shoulder. 

"I'll make it through. I'm coming back for South Korea, though," I say seriously. 

"That's it Alex. Look ahead," Jessie tells me with a smile. 

"We'll support you the entire time. Now, who wants to go grab some food?" Brianne asks with a smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Author's Note

Ok I'm really sorry this is SUPER short but it's a filler chapter: next one is back in Boston and will we longer!
Feel free to comment about my story or yours, I love feedback and new stories!
Bleed black and gold my goalies,

Kat

(P. S. Thanks for 3.5k!)