PJ Liguori (KickThePj) x Reader. REQUESTS CLOSED

Depression.

A/n: this isn't a PJ one shot. Just something I wrote while feeling down. Possible trigger warning.

Depression: a black hole sucking out all of your happiness. Making you feel either empty and hollow or like you are rotten and black on the inside. No motivation to do the things you once loved and enjoyed and that made you happy. You were once the girl who had sunshine in her eyes, rosy cheeks, and made everyone around you smile. Now your eyes are vacant, dead. Your cheeks are sunken from lack of appetite. Now the people close to you worry about you. The people you once considered friends at school avoid you, unaware of how it feels to be hollow and empty. You, devoid of all emotions other than sadness and anger at yourself and the others around you who treat you like a misunderstood creature. They, the ones who slink away, don't know what it's like to want to put a blade to their wrist and glide it across the fragile skin, watching as the crimson seeps its way to the top. They don't know what it looks like to see drops of their own blood bright against the stark whiteness of the sink. Or how it feels to be faint and dizzy from the blood that just won't stop coming out of the cut they just made. They don't know how bad but how good it feels at the same time to feel the sting from the cut. They don't know how it feels to sit on the bathroom floor, crumpled and sobbing because they just want to feel normal, if only for five minutes. But YOU, you are the one who knows what it's like to feel all of those things. You are the one who after the cut finally stops bleeding, stands up and sways back to your room, tears dried on your face and eyes swollen and red. There, next to all the other healing cuts and scars, is another visible moment of sadness that almost got to you. You finally work up the courage and strength to go to the doctor, to seek help. You got a therapist you see once a week. Even some medicine to help. But you still feel empty. Lonely. Not loved by someone other than family.
But let me tell you: one day, you will find a person who will love you. Understand you. Not walk away because they are afraid of the things that bother you. They will hold you when you are crumpled on the floor, wanting to cut yourself. They will kiss those scars and call you beautiful. Wipe away your tears and tell you they love you. They will hug you so tightly that all of those beautiful, jaggedly broken pieces of yours will fit perfectly back together. You will feel whole. Loved. You cheeks will regain color and fullness. Your eyes will return to their original glowing selves.
So even when you feel at your lowest, even when you think you can't take it anymore, remember that someone is out there waiting to bump into you and love you for who you are.