She Will Be Loved

Forget Me

Tobin's POV

I spent the night in Allie's room, because I knew I needed to get out of there before I did anything else stupid. How could you be so stupid Tobin. She is engaged for fucks sake. What were you thinking? I miss her so much, and it is so hard to be around her. You can't let anything happen between us. You need to be happy for her. You are happy for her. All these thoughts were taking over me. I avoided going to breakfast this morning to avoid seeing her. I just need to make myself believe this is best for her. Ryder can give her things I can't, like...well...HAPPINESS!

I just got done getting ready for weights and started to head to the bus. I couldn't help but block out everything around me. I put my earbuds in, blaring music and going straight to my seat by Amy Rodriguez. Who I met a little over a year ago when she spent some time in Paris. When we got to the weight room I was zoned in instantly to training. It didn't take long for me to be breaking sweat. I was doing my 2nd set of squats at the time and decided to lose my shirt like a few of my fellow teammates. Whistling "Tobin your fan girls are right.... Paris did you wonders babe." Allie said making me grin and chuckle. When I was done with my work I out I went to restroom before time to load the bus. I was washing my hands when I heard the voice I was avoiding morning. "Allie is right you know? I didn't think you could be anymore-" I cut her off not being able to turn around, but speaking before her words could take over me. "Thanks, to bad I can't go back." I said, not realizing I said the last part till after I said it. " I didn't realize just how hard I was gripping the counter till my hands started to really burn. "Really, because I am ecstatic you are home. It was living hell with out you." I heard her say just above a whisper, and I lost it there. "Stop saying it was a "living hell" when you are engaged to be married Alex. Stop saying that when in a little under two months I'll be in the audience listening you say I do to him." I slammed my hand on the counter and yelled, but regretted it after when I saw the fear in her eyes so I changed my tone. It killed me to raise my voice and I think because of it I was about to be sick. "I don't blame you, but stop trying to make things easier and better for everyone. Look at it this way.... I saved you from Servando, and Ryder is saving you from me. Everything will be okay Alex, you are going to get married and I'll be the best friend I should have been and stayed being a long time ago." I said looking her in the eyes, but not getting close enough to lose control. She shook her head slowly and I saw a tear fall. Oh shit no, please don't cry. Wait no, let her be mad or sad, she'll go to Ryder for comfort. Don't give in. Get out of here man. Do it leave, leave. NOW! I was in an argument with myself till I heard her barely audibly rasp out. "I love you Tobin,please-" I cut her off knowing I had to do the only thing to do. I had to hurt the one person I love most. I just pray it is what is best. "Don't Alex, stop loving me. Hate me, hate me for what I've done. Hate me for leaving you, for abandoning you." I said trying to not cry and sound as bitter as I possibly could. "No, I love you and nothing you can say or do will change that Tobin" she said and I didn't realize how close she was till I felt her lips on mine in a gentle kiss. With every bone in my body I shut down. It took everything, but I didn't react. It was like swallowing a flat iron. When she realized I was not reacting she laced her hand in my hair and leaned into kiss me again. I pulled back and spoke the words that I hate myself for even thinking and letting them roll off my tongue. "I am in love with someone else Alex. Someone from my team in Paris. I have been denying it thinking I could still be in love with you. I am sorry I lied to you, but I am in a relationship Alex. I am happy with her, and I am madly in love with her." I said and I think my heart stopped when I saw the hurt, pain, disbelief, regret, and a whole handful of other emotions wash over her face. She bit her lip to try and suppress tears, but a few fell. I couldn't look at her anymore so I looked away. I was about to give in, take everything back, and rap her in my arms for protection. It pained me that the one I was having to protect her from was indeed myself. I was lost in my own thought when I felt her connect our lips yet again. I reacted instantly with out even noticing, but I couldn't hold it back knowing it would be the last time. I lost control because of her intoxicating me with desperation and desire. I quickly picked her up setting her on the counter top, but never disconnecting our lips. My thoughts and everything around me became a blur, like almost nonexistent. She pulled me in between her legs by my shirt. She surprised me when she bit my lower lip and pulled it between her teeth before sucking on it. I nearly moaned, but not I hide it enough. I felt her chilled hands being brought under my muscle shirt and it brought me back to earth. I pulled away leaving us both breathing hard. Looking dead in her piercing blue eyes I spoke. "Forget me, forget everything and be happy. Bye Alex" I said before slowly exiting to go load the bus. While doing so trying not to cry every last tear I have. You did the right thing. My mind says, but every bone inside me wants to go back running to her.

Alex's POV

I can't believe what she said, and I didn't. That's why I kissed her with as much as I could to try to prove that I love her and I know she loves me. I have never felt so hurt, and empty in my life. We just got back to the hotel and I was so surprised to see Ryder at the front of the hotel with roses. He yelled out to me, smiling his grin that girls fall at his feet for. "The world just stopped because The Alex Morgan just appeared looking better then ever." He said while picking me up and spinning me around. He took both sides of my face in his hands and kissed me. I instantly thought of Tobin and her seeing and pulled away. He gave me a confused look. "Lets go inside and catch up" I said trying to cover up my discomfort. I quickly searched for Tobin but she was no where to be found. When we got inside I told him I'd come to his room after showering and changing into more clothes, and he just nodded okay before kissing me on the cheek. I got off the elevator and was making my way to my room when I saw Tobin trying to swipe the card. I couldn't help but smile at how cute she looked concentrating with her tongue out. Then my smile quickly turned to a frown when a beautiful girl wearing a PSG shirt came from the other end of the hall dropping her bags and running to Tobin. My heart stopped when she slid in front of Tobin between the door and her. Tobin looked shocked and she frowned looking down at her feet. The girl asked something I couldn't completely make out, but I could read my name come off her lips and Tobin nod her head slowly. The mystery girl slowly rapped Tobin's hand around her and Tobin held it there. The girl then leaned in and connected their lips. My heart stopped, but I felt hope when Tobin pulled away. She turned quickly to the opposite wall and then of all things that could happen. "Hey babe what happened to coming to my room."Ryder yells down the hall at me. Her eyes make contact with mine and I can now see she's been crying. My heart felt like it fell to the deepest pit in my stomach. She kept eye contact till Ryder came rapping me in his arms from behind and kissing my cheek. She looked away then shook her head frantically before hitting the door across the hall. I flinched and so did Ryder. I heard the voice of the girl across from Tobin. "Tobin... baby... breathe" she spoke soothingly to her. "Lets go inside and I'll make everything go away." She said and I cringed at the thought. She walked slowly back in front of her and leaned in to kiss her again. Tobin this time reacted and she didn't seem to notice the girl pit pocket our room key out of her back pocket. Next thing I know she has Tobin up against our door while she unlocks it. They stumble into the room and shut the door. "That was weird" Ryder says interrupting my depressing thoughts. "I've changed my mind, lets just go to your room babe and I'll shower there." I spoke trying not to sound to depressed. He nodded taking my hand in his and walking me to his room.