The Unknown Reason |TomxTord|

.~:3:~.

Pff anyone gets the reference- Three- ya'know, cause that's my- forget it nvm.

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A/N from the future.
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This scene contains suicidal topics and cutting. Please read with caution.

.:Tord's POV... Still:.
I had trouble sleeping. The others were stuck inside my head like glue. I couldn't get them out of my head, instead, they made it harder.
As a leader, I shouldn't be like this, I guess what I should say would be, emotional.
But I was.
And I always have been.
Being a leader means you couldn't be soft, no weaknesses. Or you can't show it.
You cannot be close to anyone. No loved ones. That puts you- mostly THEM- in danger. And I cannot risk anything like that.
Especially dealing with the blue leader.
To be honest, I never cared about being a leader, or having an enemy. But I guess it was a type of ying-yang situation. One needs the other.
I need the blue leader for shipment.
He needs me for shipping guns.
One cannot work with the other one gone.
Heh...
Just like me and Tom...
Gah I missed him... so much.
I missed US.
...
Why did I have to FUCK it up for us?
I honestly hated myself in the moment. I hated everything.
I stared at my ceiling, watching my fan spinning above me. I sighed and looked to my desk. It was a picture of me and Tom, he was wearing a blue shirt that was too big for him to wear, and picked up the picture and stared at it, chuckling at our younger self.
Tom was much sweeter when he was younger. Even if he was picked on, he was able to keep a smile on his face...
Heh...

.:Tom's POV:.
I stumbled over to my bed, drunken and in pain. I grabbed my flask and chugged it down, having a huge burning feeling in my throat. I groaned, the pain was too much.
I lay down on my bed, starring up. Having thoughts running through my mind.
Tord...
...
Why did you do it...?
WHY did you do it...?
I wish it wasn't like this...
I continued to chug down till there was no more. Having more pain in my throat, feeling like it's being stabbed.
I tear up just a bit. Too much for me to handle.
I can't handle pain.
I CANT handle love.
I can't handle... being away from Tord. I needed him.
But instead, I fucked it up. For both of us. I wished I didn't. But I did.
It WAS my fault. I always was and it always HAS.
I felt more and more tears run down my cheek, it wouldn't stop. It can't stop.
"Please... someone... end me" I whimpered. I needed someone. I needed him.
I ran to the bathroom and splashed water on my face, trying to wipe my tiredness away.
~~~ Start of Warning ~~~
I looked at the counter. A brand new blade was there. Sitting perfectly still...
Just for me I thought.
I smiled weakly with a tear in my eye.
I grabbed the blade and rolled up my left hoodie sleeve.
I slowly pushed the blade against my skin, whimpering in pain.
I did this 10 times. Hopefully no one could hear my cries in pain.
I quickly washed the blood away and pulled my sleeve down.
~~~ End of Warning ~~~
I felt another burning feeling in my throat. I quickly brought up the toilet seat and started throwing up.
I heard the door slam open and a gasp escaped softly.
A pair of arms helped pull back my hair and another patting my back gently.
Once I finished, I looked to see who it was.
Edd...
He grabbed a towel and wiped my mouth, forcing a smile.
I grasped onto him, pulling him into a tight hug.
I didn't want to let go. I couldn't.
"I want him back..." I whispered in his ear weakly.
He sighed. "I know Tom... I know..."

A/N
Woah long chapter :00 anyways I hoped you liked the story!! Don't worry, we will have back story. Promised.
Word count: 688