Now I know her name 💗 [ A Shawn Mendes Fanfic]

29. As If

"Shawn!!!"
He screams.

As if it's him.

I bite my lip.

"Babe you good?"
Aaron asks concerned.

"Yeah Cam just made me jump"
I say faking a laugh.

Did Cam know he'd be here?
Why wouldn't he tell me?

I can hear Shawn's sweet, familiar voice as he speaks to everyone.
He then walks into the room I'm in and stops.
We just stare into each others eyes my heart pounding out of my chest.

I can't even breathe.

I see him glance at Aaron.
He turns away and heads back out if the room.

Cameron, realising what just happened follows after him whilst I stay frozen.
*****************
Shawn's POV:
She's Cam's cousin of course she'd be here.

Why didn't I think of that?

I mean I did but I didn't want to.
My heart breaks a little more every time I even think of her.

We just stared at one another I physically and emotionally couldn't do anymore than that.
I couldn't take it so I walked away.
I didn't even say hello to Aaron...

Aaron.

Wtf is he doing with his arm around my girl!

I mean Vanessa...
She isn't mine.

I pray she isn't his though.

I feel a hand on my shoulder.

"Shawn I'm so sorry it didn't even cross my mind"
Cameron stutters.

"It's okay I guess. I just ..."

"It hurts?"

I turn my head, feeling tears in my eyes.

"How's she been?"

I say holding them back.

"You mean since you asked yesterday?"

"She's with Aaron?"

"Not officially but they've been dating - I didn't know it was our Aaron 'till today"

"He didn't ask your permission?"

I feel annoyed cause I know I could treat her better.

"Shawn chill, they're not official okay"

"So I've lost her"

"That's my point, not yet."

"But Aaron..."
I want to scream.

Every ounce of me wants to run in, lift her up; kiss her and swear I'll never leave again.
But I can't.

"Aaron is going back to Magcon with me tomorrow, you'll have four days, and you can stay at my place"

"Cameron this is wrong"

"But it could be love"

I sigh.
As cringe as it sounds, it's true.
I know I love her.  I always have.

I breathe in and go back to the room Vanessa was sitting in.

She isn't there anymore but I see Aaron come in from the back porch.

"Shawn- you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine you?" I keep my emotions hidden.

"I'm good, nice to see you again"

"Likewise, I'm gonna get some fresh air"

"Oh sweet - see you in a bit I guess" he says as he walks past and taps me on the shoulder.

Fresh air- I don't need fresh air - I need Vanessa.