Chapter 30

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Song: gotta go on my way by Vanessa hudgens

"Don't wanna leave it all behind 
  But I get my hopes up
And I watch them fall every time "
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Tom's POV :

I'm gonna kill Jacob and tony for doing that, I can't believe they actually let Harrison get away, I called his phone about a hundred times but he isn't answering, I begged Xavier and Laura to tell me where he went but they just wouldn't tell me.

Jon, the director of the movie, called us and apparently we're in a shit ton of trouble for leaving the set without telling anybody so we had to go directly to the set which meant I couldn't look for Harrison.

Nobody  talked through the entire ride, I couldn't even look at Harry, he hasn't said a word to me since everything happened and I honestly didn't know how he would react to me dating a guy especially that the guy is harrison, my best friend since forever.

When did everything get so complicated ? I know  what I did was wrong, I should've known that breaking up with Harrison would lead to more damage than good, but as usual I always find a way to fuck everything up, and I just lost it when I saw Xavier and Harrison together that I wasn't even thinking I just did the first thing that came into my mind which was fucked up on so many levels.

I just wish harrison knew how much I cared about him, how could he ever think that I don't have feelings for him? I  would never toy with someone's feelings like that I just don't know if he'll ever believe me, considering all the bullshit I've put him through I wouldn't blame him for not believing me.

The car stopped and we all got out, we went to the set and we were told that we can't ever leave the set like that ever again, thank god it ended there.

We started filming right after that but the only thing on my mind was How to find a way to talk to Harrison, I got called multiple times by John asking me why I was so distracted since I kept forgetting my lines and when to say them, I hated that I was being unprofessional but I couldn't stop thinking about Harrison.

I also felt bad for the way I treated Xavier, he's a  really cool dude and I was such an ass to him because of my stupid jealousy, I apologized to him for being a dick and he was pretty chill about it and said that it's okay which was cool I was really grateful for that.

Jacob and tony tried to apologize many times but I just didn't wanna talk to them right now, I know they were trying to help but it wasn't their place to keep me from talking to Harrison.

I need to show harrison how much he means to me and I will do anything to make him Believe how much he means to me and how much I care for him.

My heart stopped when he told me he loved me, I couldn't believe that he Actually would, especially when I was such an asshole to him, he probably Hates me right now and to be honest I would too.

I'm gonna stop acting like the victim because it's hurting  the people I care for and costing me the most important relationships in my life, I'm gonna get my shit together for Harrison.

He deserves to be happy, and lately I've caused him so much pain that I hate myself for doing so.

I don't know how long that would take but I do know that I will go through that  for harrison and for myself, so we can be together.

Thankfully we were able to finish all the scenes we were supposed to shoot today, once we were done and everyone was packing their stuff and getting ready to leave I just couldn't wait to go find harrison and talk things through.

I got in my trailer to find Harry waiting for me there I closed the door and we just stared at each other.

I didn't know what to say, this my brother we're talking about, his acceptance means a lot to me and I would be devastated if he didn't accept me for who I am.

" so how long have you and harrison been together " he asked after a few minutes of silence

" after we came from bora bora " I whispered.

" what!? You guys have Been together this long and you didn't tell me " he said and he looked hurt

" I know and I'm so sorry  for not telling you, it's just that we weren't ready and I wasn't really in a position to be thinking about That with everything that has been going on I guess we never really talked about it and there's nothing much to tell now, we're over because of my stupid mistakes and I don't know if Harrison is ever gonna be ready to be with me again because I sure wouldn't "

" oh I'm sorry T but you two will be together again trust me "

" so you're not freaked out by this? "

" why would I be ? It doesn't matter to me what gender you're into as long as you're happy, you're my brother that's all I care about "

I was so happy and relieved, you know Harry may be my younger brother but honestly he is so much wiser than his age. I hugged him and smiled, well at least one relationship in my life isn't screwed.

" now go get your man "

I nodded and ran out of the set to get a taxi for go to the hotel, once I reached there I remembered that Harrison got a different room so I asked the receptionist to open the room for me.

After a lot of convincing she finally accepted and gave me a key, I ran up the stairs and unlocked the door.

I got in expecting Harrison to be there and preparing what to say to him, what I didn't expect was the room to be completely empty and neat with no sign that somebody was here.

I stared freaking out and my mind went to a lot of shitty situations, I opened the closet to find it completely empty.

Harrison left, he fucking left and I don't have a damn clue where he went.

I lost all control and just started screaming and throwing Everything in my way while crying, I was acting like a fucking mad man and I'm surprised that nobody came up to see where the noise came from.

" FUCK " I screamed and fell on the floor crying.

Harrison is gone, he's  fucking gone and it's all my fault.

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