Sunshine and City Lights ➳ z.m.

T H R E E

''A baby?'' I whisper screamed at Zayn.

He nodded, then looked out the window. I leaned my head back on the seat, as I felt hot tears start to gather in my eyes.

First, I have to marry a man I don't know much less love, now I have to have a baby with this man. I don't care about me anymore! What about this baby? How would that fit into our lives? After this year, Zayn & I are through. Would we have to either share this baby, or fight for custody.

I felt the tears start to fall from my eyes.

All I ever wanted in life was to find a loving man, who loved me for who I was, & who didn't need me to be a beauty queen for him to love me. I wanted the simple married woman & loving mother life. Not this crazy insane stupid lie that I was currently being made to live.

Why would Paul want us to have a kid? Just to make it seem more real I guess. How could I do this for a year or possibly longer?

I looked back in front of me as the plane prepared for take off. The flight itself was about 8 hours, because we were going to California from London.

I plugged my ear phones into my ears, & played the first song on my iPod. I continued thinking about the baby thing. The plane left the runway, & we were now not only off to our Honeymoon, but today was the first day of our future together.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, & looked over to see Zayn looking at me.

''You okay?''

'No! How could you even ask that?''

''I don't want to be married to you either. But neither of us have a choice. If it were up to me, I would divorce you right now. But I can't. So suck it up doll''

I had to bite my tongue to keep from screaming at him all of these things that I had bottled up inside of me.

He asked if I hated him earlier. I lied. I hate him with some kind of fiery passion that I can't put out the fire with a million gallons of water. Yes, I really hated him. Every single thing about him.

Hey Holz. You hate him for right now,  but trust me, you wont here in a while. Get to know him and see where it takes you.

I know he hated me too. Fine whatever. I didn't ask him to marry me, so I could care less. He was a one year thing & I wouldn't let it last any longer. Then there's the baby. God, I would have to try & make Zayn & I work because this child that he & I are supposed to have needs a stable family.

I closed my eyes, almost praying that I wouldn't wake up tomorrow morning.

But my prayers obviously weren't heard, because as soon as the sun shone through the window of the 747, my eyes flew open.

I covered my arms with my jacket, & leaned my head on the window looking out at the land below. Everything looked so tiny from way up here. I felt about as big as everything looked right now. I heard Zayn groan, & looked over at him.

He looked back at me with wide, but tired eyes.

''Did you sleep well?''

''Just fine thank you''

Our conversation was blunt & short, mainly because I was still disgusted at his words yesterday.

I turned on my phone, & looked around making sure no one was watching before I turned on my wi-fi connection & logged into my twitter.

I scrolled through my notifications, seeing most of them asking for pictures of Zayn & I & a lot of them asking for follows. Some people were so annoying. I also checked my texts. One of them was from Ryan, demanding me to post a 'couply picture' of Zayn & I together.