Confessions of a Sex Addict

Twenty-two

Dr. P. Banner-Bloom ⬆️ picture above

All I wanted was something; something to numb the pain... make it go away. It's been three weeks with no sex, no touching of another human being, no smelling of that human, no fantasizing, no climax, nothing. Did I deserve this? Did I do something wrong? Was I missing something. It's been three weeks, seventeen hours and counting... with no Dr. DeShawn, no Joy... no Janice... no... sex. Three weeks ago I saw Janice Cooper in group, she was new to the program and has been for months even when SaraBeth was alive and around.

I never really noticed how beautiful she was; how well put together she was. Janice Cooper was unbelievably gorgeous. Long jet black hair with a slight bang on the side and rosy cheek bones with glasses.

She was the same height as me but four inches shorter which is a good thing since I like my women shorter than me. I sat down when group began and Janice sat next to Amberlynn across from me. I glanced over at her; she seemed a little blue. I cleared my throat and licked my lips slowly as I placed my head down as we all waited for the new psychiatrist.

Each of our psychiatrist stood behind us while quietly waiting. I turned my head and Dr. DeShawn was reading a book "Fifty Shades of Grey" figures... I chuckled under my breath as she clenched her legs tightly and bit down on the side of her lip as she turned the page. I turned back around and in walked Dr. Patricia Banner-Bloom; a thirty-five year old african american woman, with black frizzy hair and nerdy glasses.

She was average height with thick hips and I would say her cup size would be close to a 34D or C. She didn't seem married or anything not like it mattered. Some of the girls turned their heads and clicked their teeth as they talked among themselves about how sexy she was, and she was unbelievably sexy beyond belief in my opinion.

She sat down in her chair and looked at all of us. She waited five minutes before speaking to everyone. Her voice was soothing and relaxing, her skin was so soft it's like you can feel it on your skin as you touch yourself just to get off. I slowly gazed up at her once she turned my way; and our eyes connected I swear there was a spark or something.

Dr. DeShawn wasn't so happy that I was giving goo goo eyes to the new doctor as I licked my lips. Group was surprisingly good for once. It was helpful and I really got a lot out of it. Everyone shared and was very supportive of one another, and I even shared a few stories about how I've dealt with the death of SaraBeth. How much I miss her skin against mine as she would lay on my chest and talk about her many stories, and also the photos she would take and hang up in her room. I miss her... so much.

When group ended Dr. Banner-Bloom pulled me aside wanting me to open up more about my childhood and background. I didn't say much as Dr. DeShawn came and walked me back to my room. I closed my door as Dr. DeShawn sat at the edge of my bed with my chart in her hands laying on her lap then she crossed one leg behind the other.

"So... Bates what do... you uh think?" she said to me in a stern voice; almost as if she was mad at me or something. I looked at her with a concerned look as I leaned against the wall with my arms folded and head down facing the floor.

"ALEC!...." she demanded as I looked up at her. Her eyes were puffy and red like she'd been crying. I didn't say anything as the silence filled the room.

"Dr. DeShawn... I..." I say to her as she looks at me in an angry way.

"DON'T SAY ANYTHING to me... ALEC BATES. YOU LOST THAT RIGHT TALKING TO ME!." she says as she yells at me then she breaks down in tears and cries.