Confessions of a Sex Addict

Sneak Peak of Book II: Temptation, Seduction, Obsession

Jasmine ⬆️ picture above

It's been three years and I've managed to keep my impulses and urges under control. I'm now twenty-six and now in a serious, committed relationship with an amazing woman named Rebecca Ramos who likes be referred to as Becky and her six-year-old daughter Annabelle. I met Becky six months after I came out of rehab; she doesn't know that I was addicted to sex for so many years. I want to tell her someday, but I don't know when nor how to. Her and Annabelle are my world... my everything. I don't want her to run away if I do end up telling her. It's been two and a half years and I can finally say that I've found the one... let's just hope so. I still think about it every now and then.

Holding a woman close, never letting her go, making her feel that sweet sensation... that spark in her eyes as your eyes lock; connecting with that special someone as your lips collide. Having that feeling of chills as it tingles down your spine. And when your lips pull apart you feel that connection as she tells you she loves you. Your heart starts to melt as a tear falls from your face as you say it back to her... makes it all worth the wait. The feelings you get when you go to sleep at night. Late night phone conversations... her laugh, giggles, smiles, moans... just about everything you can think of. That perfect woman the one that makes the world go around. The one you stay up all night for; just to hear her voice... she's worth it at the end of the day. I have two special girls in my life... Becky, and Annabelle, they complete me.

No one ever said life was easy, no one ever said it would be a walk in the park either, but one thing for sure you've got each other to fall back on when times are tough. The one that would stick by you through it all. Becky, Annabella, and I aren't always the perfect family. There are times Becky and I have fights mostly about money and Annabelle when she's misbehaving, but I wouldn't trade them for anyone. She's as beautiful as the sunrise when it sets in summer and her daughter is as joyful as the sun when it rises in the morning.

Annabelle has her mother's smile, eyes, and grace. She has her dad's ambition to try hard, and if you ask me she acts more like her mother each day. Last summer when Annabelle visited her father he was being locked up for something he claims he didn't do; she was four when her father was convicted of murder in the first degree for robbing, and killing the clerk at a convenience store down on 3rd street; so, Becky and Annabella live with me in my apartment on Elm Street.

It's a very small apartment. One bedroom with a guest room. One bathroom and a kitchen that connects to the living room where the TV is located; with a small but medium sized sofa, light brown of course and dark purple drapes hanging by every single window. It's not a mansion, or anything fancy but it'll have to do for now. Becky and her daughter don't seem to mind.

Ever since I completed rehab I tend to think about Joy, Dr. DeShawn, Amberlynn, Spencer, and all the others but most of all SaraBeth... She was something special... that girl was going to be someone someday. If I just knew what it was she was struggling with instead of using her for my own selfish needs and pleasures, then she would still be alive today. I still wake up some nights screaming with Becky laying in my arms as I held her close to me. I still dream about Sarabeth. I still think about Dr. DeShawn, and Joy of all the great times we had. Having their breaths breathe down my neck as I would kiss each weak spot; making them cum as it would trickle down my throat and I suck on their clits making them moan like wild animals. The wildest animal of them all was Lapis.

Sex with Rebecca... is beyond amazing there are no words to describe the magic, the intensity. Her tricks, surprises and the excitement we both get out of it. I know I'm the one to talk being a sex addict and all. I almost got caught one night coming in from a late-night jog. Rebecca went through my memory box and found my deepest darkest secrets. All the porn magazines, vibrators, straps I'd use on other women and my notebook from when I was in rehab. We fought over it for about an hour at the most until I sat her down and came clean and told her everything about me; from when I was thirteen up until now. At first, I thought she'd be mad or at least upset because I kept this part of me from her for so long I thought she'd take Annabelle and leave me, but she did just about the opposite. She stayed and helped me because although I was getting somewhat better I wasn't completely healed.