Not So Normal

Chapter 61

   I can't get in the pool. The guys will just be disgusted by the sight of my cut up thighs. I don't know if they even know that I cut (well, used to anyway), let alone that it was that bad! I can barely stand the sight of my legs, so I can't imagine how they're going to feel about it.

   I can't believe Niall didn't think about that. I guess I shouldn't expect it to always be on his mind, but it's something he should at least consider. He's going to have to deal with me being insecure about this until my scars go away. If they go away; they're pretty bad. I know I'll have permanent scars from a few of the cuts, but I hope that most of them will eventually go away.

   Niall notices my panicked expression and his expression turns to one of realization. The other guys all jump in the pool, leaving me and Niall alone by our stuff.

   "Elissa, I'm so sorry! I wasn't even thinking about that. The guys won't judge you if they see the scars. We all have our weaknesses, and yours is just more visible than theirs. But you don't have to swim if you really don't want them to see. I can make some excuse for you if you want," he says quietly. I seriously consider this for a few seconds, but I decide against it. The guys are probably going to see my scars eventually even if I didn't let them see them today.

   "What's taking you guys so long?" Louis yells, right as he gets splashed by a laughing Zayn. Niall gives me a concerned look and I make my final decision.

   "I... I think I'll just let them see," I whisper. Niall gives me a comforting hug and then steps back so I can take my sundress off. I close my eyes, but I hear the guys in the pool go quiet when my scars are exposed. Niall must glare at them or something because they awkwardly start talking and messing around again a few seconds later. I take a deep breath and open my eyes.

   "You're beautiful. Don't worry about what other people think," Niall whispers as we walk to the edge of the pool. I don't reply, and I just stand silently for a few seconds, looking down into the crystal clear water. I decide to surprise Niall, so I grin and shove him into the pool.

   "Gotcha!" I say proudly. The guys all laugh and go to attack Niall. I jump in to join them and we all team up on Niall. He is screwed.

   Our time at the pool is a blast. The guys make no mention of my scars, which I am very grateful for. I'll tell them about it someday, but probably not anytime soon. Maybe I'll tell them in a couple months when tour is over. I think someone mentioned spending Christmas in LA, so maybe I'll tell them then, but who knows.

   The only reason we even leave the pool is because we're all hungry. None of us want to go out for dinner, so we decide to just order room service when we get back up to the room. We get out of the pool and dry off before heading back inside. I just sling my towel over my shoulder and don't put my sundress back on, so if anyone pays attention to us while we're walking back inside, they get a nice view of my scars.

   When we get back to the room, I go change into sweats and a tank top and put my hair in a ponytail. I hate dealing with wet hair, but I'm not in the mood to take a shower and then dry it right now. I'll do it in the morning. We all smell like chlorine, so I don't think any of us really care.

   We pig out on room service food and then like an hour after dinner we order dessert.  This trip has had way too much eating junk food involved. The gym back home will be happy to have my service.

   We all just sit around and talk until almost midnight. I never thought that guys could talk so much. I make Harry tell me about his new girlfriend and he's just so cute about it. I'm so glad he's finally in a relationship. If I didn't know better, I would think he liked me. Just some of the things he'd do around me and stuff he'd say made me think that sometimes. But that's obviously not the case. After we talk about Harry's love life, I switch the spotlight to Liam. He hasn't mentioned Elizabeth in a while, and I want to know how things are going between them.

   "So Liam, how's Elizabeth? You haven't talked about her at all today. That's a record," I say, teasing. Liam's face turns to stone and all the guys tense up.

   "Elissa," Niall whispers, his voice laced with warning.

   "No, don't be like that! What the hell is going on?" I ask angrily. Liam gets up abruptly and leaves the room. The rest of the guys look down awkwardly and no one speaks up.

   "Seriously guys, what happened? None of you are leaving this room until I know what's going on," I say, glaring at all of them; even Niall. No one talks for a minute, but when I threaten to post a video I took of them all dancing once on Twitter, Niall speaks.

   "After the last show in LA, Liam flew back home to surprise Elizabeth, but when he got to their house, she was in bed with another guy. Apparently she had been cheating on him for a few months. He kicked her out and beat up the guy. He took her ring back and everything. He's been in a pretty awful mood since, so this sudden trip to Hawaii has been good for him. He's devastated about it. He really thought she was the one," he explains.

   "She cheated?" I screech. How could Elizabeth do that? She doesn't seem like someone who would cheat at all! I can't believe it! I feel absolutely awful now. I have to go apologize now. I get up and start for Liam and Louis' room, but Niall stops me.

   "Give him a few minutes, okay? Let him calm down."

   "I can't believe no one told me!" I whisper yell as I sit back down on the couch next to Niall. We sit in silence for a few minutes, but I get sick of it so I get up and decide to go talk to Liam. I knock on his door, but he doesn't answer so I just walk in.

   "Liam, I'm so sorry. If I had known I never would have said anything," I say softly. Liam is sitting in a chair, staring out the window. He doesn't look at me.

   "Just go away," he says, his voice sounds strained, like he was crying.

   "Liam! I'm not going away until you talk to me about this. I know it's something you don't want to talk about. I've gone through the exact same thing, I just wasn't engaged. I caught him cheating on me at he party he brought me to. I was devastated and didn't want to talk about it, but I eventually got over it, and look where I am now. You can talk to me."

   "I'm just still processing the fact that she would do that. I really thought that she was the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with. It's hard realizing that you were wrong about that all along," he says. His voice cracks and I just want to hug him and never let go. It's hard to see him sad like this. It's like a whole new side of him.

   Liam and I talk for a while (ditching the topic of Elizabeth after a few minutes) and after a little more than an hour, I think Liam's back to normal. I know he'll be really sad for a while, but I think I got him to realize that he's better off without someone that would cheat on him.

   Liam doesn't want to go out and talk to the guys, so I leave the room and join them by myself. They look at me expectantly, so I sit down next to Niall and explain what just happened. I can't believe they just sat there for more than hour, waiting for this explanation. They're crazy. But it means they really care, which is more than anyone could ask for. They're the best of friends to each other.

   This is what life is really all about; having friends that will be there for you and always care, no matter how long things like that take. The guys of One Direction are the best friends anyone could have, and I'm glad they're mine. I couldn't ask for anyone better to spend my time with.

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I know it's not a super great chapter and it's been forever, and I am so sorry! I've been so effing busy that I haven't had any time to work on this. My parents forced me into family time all last weekend (awful, I know) and I've been cramped with homework because I have my AP test in like 2 1/2 weeks that I need to prepare for and it's killing me. After my AP test I will have so much more time to write.

I'll try to get a couple updates in this weekend, but definitely no guarantees.

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