Title: Ruby Alert
Length: 5 pages+
Genre: Mystery / Thriller
Status: ONGOING
Rate: PG - PG - 13
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I gotta say, this was one of the most coolest novice thrillers I've read so far! I haven't gone out and read any books from this genre, but you just made me want to go sifting through that section of Wattpad! Back to the review: the opening to the plot was different (in a good way!) The mesage was very inciting and threatening! As for the characters, there were a variety of personalities that could come only from high school, but be careful on managing 6 characters in one story (and the POV's). This story is awesome and I hope the large capacity won't tip the balance on the plot. I like how the POV of each person describes at least some history with Ruby and what he or she is currently doing without overbearing the read with too many unnecessary details. 'Cause it's a thriller, y'know? I love the Saw theme you put in this story!!
There are mistakes in grammar that you can fix such as "one's" at the end of the recording. One of the punctuation errors I find commonly are dialogue lines that have fragment sentenes. I know that's how the characters are speaking, but in writing you should connect or put a comma if necessary. Also, you're either missing or adding words throughout the book. Examples are "I had always had my suspicions..." (1), "Sienna Cauna a different case..." (1), "it was to certain beautiful eyes..." (2). These will litter your storyline and affect the reading experience, so these should be cleaned up. Overall, the story was simply terrific and I hope you continue to write more!
Rating: 4.5 out of 5
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