Retrieving Love (Sequel to TBGATGB)

Chapter One

 My dearest Kade,
 
Don’t ever, and I mean ever, think that I meant to leave you behind, it was a part of the deal I had to make with Tanner.
I go, without you, I had to make sure you stayed behind and I did that the only way I knew how, going with your weakness to help people.
To help me. So I told Shae you’d stay behind to watch her, at least until graduation, so I ask that you do just that, hang around until graduation, by the time we left for Detroit test scores were in so you should be able to graduate right?
 
When I got told that I was going to have to be tutored by a Kade Mathis the first thought in my head was: “No freaking way. I’m not being tutored by some nerd.”
And my second thought being, “Who the hell is Kade Mathis.”
At first glance of you in those slacks and that sweater, I wanted to barf on it just so you’d take it off and throw it in the bin. At first I hated you, you had good grades, university was possible for you, and at first when we were at the coffee shop I thought I just made you uneasy because of reputation never would I have thought it was because you were going to fight later on.
I hated you even more when we went to your house, but it’s true just because someone’s well off doesn’t make them happy.
I had a house where two of the three people who lived there with me loved me and wanted me around, I was the one who pushed them away, whereas you pretty much lived in a house on your own. The house means nothing in comparison to what lies behind the doors.
When I saw what looked like the tip of a tattoo I laughed it off, there was no way good boy Kade had a tattoo, but then again you are anything but a good boy.
 
When I saw that boy in the arena going up against Gideon I couldn’t believe what I was seeing, in fact I thought you had a hot older brother, it wasn’t until Robin spotted and addressed me that I realised this was Kade Mathis.
Then the entire journey, I couldn’t have dreamed of being with anyone else, that one night with you is one I’ll cherish in my memory forever. I’d do anything to live through it again.
No I take that back, let’s leave that night untainted and one day make a new memory, if you wait for me.
 
You broke up with me to protect me and I retaliated in the best way I knew how, to hurt you, never did I think that it would start a fight that was deeper that you and I.
I’m sorry for what I did with James, and I’ll never apologise enough for that horrid night, but I’m glad you got your brother back out of all of this.
I never asked how you were after what happened at Edison’s house. I should have but I didn’t.
I’ll never be able to repay the happy moments you gave me, I’d always wanted adventure, I didn’t think it would come in the form of a nerd boy fighter but it did and I wouldn’t change it.
 
Get a message to Rob for me will you? Tell him he’s a dick but I love him, and he’s an older brother to me. I never had a brother, now I feel I do.
 
And you Kaiden James Mathis. Did you know that you told me you loved me once before. Back at that house we were at when planning to attack Edison’s. It was after everything that happened, I wrote it off to painkillers or that you were delusional, but the truth is, I was terrified, and so so scared of you not returning these feelings.
Every time I let someone close to me they let me down, I’ve never seen a true relationship. I don’t remember ever seeing my mother and my father together, it was always my father and I and eventually Erica then Shae and I don’t think it was any secret that I didn’t like that. Didn’t like Erica, Shae looked like me so Erica was the odd one out, I always found that funny, don’t ask me why.
I always thought you’d get tired of me and then leave me, but instead I’m the one to leave you.
 
I’ve never been good with words. I have two feelings pretty much: Showing too much emotion or being emotionless.
But I do know one thing and I’m hoping that by the time you’re reading this I’ve actually said it to your face, if not then know I’m simply a coward and it’ll be the first thing I say to you when I do see you.
Actually even if I do build up the courage to say it before I leave it’ll still be the first thing I say to you when I see you next because once I find out what I need to find out I will come back.
I’ll come back to you.
 
As I sit here at the clearing, tapping the pen on this piece of paper, I watch the water flow and leaves dance down to rest atop the water. Trees are dying as Autumn settles in and Winter prepares to join us in this hell on earth, but the clearing still manages to look absolutely beautiful.
 
I Love You.
 
I do and that thought does scare me, but I can’t let it control me, you need to know and now you do.
I love you Kaiden James Mathis and it’s because I love you that I have to find out about my mother, my brother and my past. If I don’t know I’ll never be able to focus on us, so once I get back with hopefully all questions answered so then it can just be you and I.
And probably Robin too.
 
I love you,
Anna.

Look the sequel is here :D Please enjoy haha Love you all xx