Critical (Jamilton)

26. Alex's Best Friend Is A Toilet

Jefferson

The next morning, Thomas woke up to Alexander yelling his name from the bathroom. It wasn't exactly fearful so he assumed it had to do with whatever hangover he was experiencing. Thomas got off the couch where he slept the night before and went into the bathroom, feeling only slightly sorry for his boyfriend, who was hunched over the toilet. 

"What?" He asked somewhat coldly. 

"Could you get me something to help?" Alex groaned. "Please?"

"Let me guess, you regret that decision?"

"Yes."

Thomas sighed and left the bathroom. He went to the kitchen where his sisters and Randolph were sitting around the table, except for Jane who was at the stove cooking. 

"How's he feeling?" Jane asked. 

"He's hugging the toilet like it's glued to his body." 

Jane nodded but didn't say anything else. He could tell she hated the situation as much as he did so he really didn't see any need to keep the conversation going. Thomas got down a cup and started mixing things together that you wouldn't normally just drink on your own. He was honestly sort of surprised that he even remembered what he was doing since he hadn't had to make it since he was a teenager. 

He finished making it and brought it up to Hamilton, who was just laying on the floor by the time Thomas got to him. He set the cup down on the sink. 

"There," he muttered. "drink that."

He turned to walk away but Alex grabbed his ankle, muttering something into the rug. 

"Pick up your head, Hamilton."

Han just turned it, keeping his eyes closed. "Turn off the light and stop talking."

Thomas rolled his eyes and pulled Alexander off the ground, ignoring the complaints that came with the sudden movement.

"You can't just lay on the bathroom floor," Jefferson explained.

"I don't want to move," Alex muttered. 

"Well, that--"

"Thomas, if you don't shut up my head is going to explode." 

"Is that a good or bad thing?" 

"Bad, now, and this is me begging you, shut up." 

Thomas laughed. "Last night you were telling me how sexy my voice was, what happened to that?" 

Hamilton just groaned. As soon as they were in the room, he flopped onto the bed and pulled a pillow over his head, muttering that he still wanted the light off. 

Jefferson flicked off the light and turned to leave the room. Alex muttered something into the mattress making Thomas tunr back around, reminding him to pick his head up. Like before, he only turned his face. 

"How mad are you?" He mumbled.

"At you?"

Alexander hummed in response.

Thomas hesitated for a second before saying, "Pretty mad."

"Too mad to come lay with me?"

Again Thomas hesitated. He was definitely mad enough to ignore him at least for a while, but that was probably extremely immature. Then again Hamilton still smelled like alcohol and that didn't exactly bring up sunshine and rainbows for Thomas.

"Shower first," he said finally. "I'm gonna go talk to Laf about France."

"I love you," Alex tried, cracking open of his eyes.

"Do you love me or my 'sexy voice'?" Thomas asked with a smirk.

"I take it back, my love is being taken back," Hamilton groaned. 

"Okay fine, I won't make fun of you. You are a 'hot piece o' Ham', after all." 

"Oh my God, stop."

"Alright, alright, I'm done now," Thomas laughed. "Partay, Alex, partay."

Thomas walked away, listening to Alexander groaning dramatically. As promised, he went to go talk to his friend about using his French home for a much-needed vacation. 

As soon as Jefferson mentioned that he wanted to take a far off vacation for the sake Hamilton, Lafayette agreed and, like Thomas suspected, offered to pay for the entire thing as a favor. He insisted that it was the least he could do since everyone else was helping out so much and he'd barely even interacted with him, other than scattered playdate between Georges and Philip. 

"Laf, honestly, I just came to ask about the place--" 

"And you got more than you expected," the Frenchman said. "I'm paying for it, and that's final." 

Thomas held up his hands defensively. "You're a real dad friend, you know that?"

"What can I say? Parenthood changes people." He looked at Jefferson like he was hinting at something. Thomas pretended he didn't notice.  Laf continued hinting. "And say you wanted to live there permanently, I could definitely help you find the perfect family home." 

"Nope, already have one here," Thomas said, still pretending he didn't know what his friend was talking about in hopes that he would stop talking about it. 

"Marriage and children, Jefferson, you know that's what I'm talking about." 

Thomas held out an 'oh' sound. "In that case, no."

"Why not?"

"We're just looking for a vacation so he can relax."

"In the most romantic country?" Laf asked with a smirk. "You're right, nothing anything life changing could ever happen there." 

"I'm not planning on proposing!" 

"But if he did you'd say yes?" 

"Alright, I'm leaving," Thomas muttered, grabbing his keys and jacket. "Thanks for agreeing to let us use your place--"

"And paying, I'm going to pay for you to go and there's no getting out of it."

Thomas groaned and acknowledged the fact that Lafayette was paying. He did feel bad for taking the man's money, but he was pretty insistent and if Thomas used his money for everything, they wouldn't be able to do anything other than sit and stare at the walls. 

Jefferson left the house and decided to grab some headache pills for his idiot of a boyfriend on the way back home. 

He was also planning on making fun of him a little more, just to downgrade his own anger.