ENTRIES ▹ misc.

•dan's diss track but shakespeare•

so there are a lot of websites in which you can translate modern english into shakespearean english
and i did a thing
i'm not sure if i regret it yet but i probably will
so
here
"A month without uploading that gent cometh backeth with a tag (whoo) yond nay one yea tagg'd that gent that gent's not a dareth to drageth (ouch) so prepareth f'r an attacketh and by yond i cullionly cringe (cringe) causeth this moth'rf*ck'rs bout to beest didst drageth by his fringe first things first thou're freakishly tall, 't's weird thou beholdeth liketh a noodle (true) thou've didst receiveth hair yond wast m'rit in 2007 and didst did wet thou just didst taketh liketh a poodle (hobbit) throweth in a v'ry much annoying posh voice and yep yond's dan (posh) thou're what wouldst befall if 't be true 't beest true winnie the pooh f*ck'd slend'r sir thou procrastinate making videos, causeth being judg'd is scary? (ooh) thou're so closeth to being f'rgotten, the envy's imaginary (woah) the only reasoneth thou receiveth views is thou're anoth'r white guy yond people ship with his gib'r-cousin causeth those gents bethink 't's kawaii oh reasons wh'ref're dan's a faileth i'll giveth thou some thou nev'r tweet thou ov'reat all thou doth is gib'rwauling and catcheth but a winketh thou're jokes art sh*tposts and memes with nay 'riginality (uh i und'rstandeth thee not) thy family's depress'd thy didst flop thy law grise at univ'rsity and aught embarrassing yond's from thy past thou just f'rdid thou wast vegan f'r liketh three weeks then what thou didst misseth the meat? (milk) wow i'm so didst impresseth by thy cleareth m'ral integrity thou tryeth so hard to beest peaceful and diplomatic but can't maketh toast without tumblr declaring thou're problematic (boo) i couldst wendeth on thith'r's moo if 't be true 't beest true i checketh thith'r's moo things on this listeth than chins on thy neck on thy birthday thou jok'd thou wast a quart'r way to death 100? yeah at which hour getting out of catcheth but a winketh chamb'r maketh thou out of breath (real) so thy celebrity crusheth wast j-law but anon 't's evan p (mhmm) fie yea is thy sexuality 't's hard to didst putteth thou in a boxeth at which hour thou keepeth 't so blurry (what is't) i bethink 't's just to encave yond thou're secretly a furry checketh out *chewit* i'mjoking obviously. Well enow yond didst wendeth deep repress 't? yup ''re i starteth crying didst shalt we wrapeth this didst the horror up i'm gonna wendeth and m*st*rb*te, then gib'rwauling into a slice of zza (feelings) shout out to the oth'r youtub'rs especially ryan higa a cringe compilation card'd with cultural appropriation didst meeteth with nay depreciation 't's the youtube nation (youtubeee) click subscribe, if 't be true 't beest true thou wanna gazeth 4 videos a year ('r 3) to seeth mineth lasteth one from 10 years ago just click ov'r hith'r (fail) so leaveth a comment with thy reaction thou can clepe me a coystrill causeth thou just witness'd the roast of danisnotonfire"