"freak"
"retarded"
"idiotic"
"stupid"
just some of the things a family member has called me because of my ocd in the last two days.
they're not wrong.
my father has decided that the best way to treat my ocd is to punish me every time i act on a compulsion.
from a medical standpoint it's a logical solution i guess.
but it hurts oh so badly.
it's like punishing someone with depression every time they feel sad.
i want to be okay.
i want help.
but not like this.
it's killing not just me, but my relationship with my family.
i want to talk to people about it.
i really do.
but the words just can't leave my mouth.
i'm drowning in them.
all my friends are so supportive of me and so amazing. and i appreciate it so much. but right now i feel like no one can understand what's happening inside my mind.
i'm sorry this isn't the happiest chapter. on a lighter note: i came out to my sister today! it went well. i do hope you have a nice night and a great day tomorrow. <3
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ENTRIES ▹ misc.
Random❝ i love lin manuel miranda; he's my baby ❞ just some rants from a smol bean i started this when i was in eighth grade so it's very cringey i'm sorry
