Heartbreak Story - Byler

XXXI - Tangled Up

Trigger: Mentions of previous sexual assault.

Will's POV:

My eyes fluttered softly open as the morning light peered through my curtains like an unwelcome intruder on a beautiful scene playing out in my bedroom.

Mike was snoozing lightly atop my bed, his breath a light breeze against my hair as his face was buried within my locks and his arms were tangled around my stomach as he held me against his own chest. My mind replayed the events of the night before like a tape recording in my head and I smiled at the knowledge that I was dating the most loving, respecting gentleman alive.

After spending the evening with my family, my boyfriend and I had made our way into my bedroom and Mike automatically became flustered and insecure about our sleeping arrangements due to our obvious shared history. I, on the other hand, presumed that the default was that he'd sleep with me in my bed and didn't question it however Mike had a completely different idea in mind.

"What on earth are you doing?" I'd asked the boy as I huddled myself beneath the covers, missing the absence of his body, and he paced around my room, deep in search of something that I was oblivious of.

His long, curly hair swept through the air as he whipped his head to face me, looking utterly confused. "Your sleeping bag?" Mike declared almost like a question, shocked as if I was missing something obvious.

"Why?" I queried, lightly giggling yet feeling a tad muddled at the same time.

"So I can sleep." He answered simply, staring back at me with a bemused expression that mirrored exactly how I was feeling.

It took a matter of seconds but everything finally clicked into place within my mind and I understood that, despite the fact that Mike was my now my official boyfriend, he would never automatically presume I'd given my consent to anything at all - not even something as simple as us sleeping in the same bed.

My mind reeled with adoration for the boy I loved as gratitude brought tears to my eyes - gratitude that he was nothing like my first boyfriend. Alex had taught me that the label of "boyfriend" meant that your partner had the right to your body whether you wanted it or not and I had subsequently blamed myself for my own rape. I'd been forced to believe I was the one in the wrong for saying no because it made me "a bad boyfriend" so I told myself he was right when that was never the case. Here and now was the man I'd loved for as long as I could remember beginning to undo the false information ingrained and brainwashed into my mind with a simple action he probably deemed insignificant as he was aware it was standard practice to not invite yourself into someone else's bed without permission, even if you were dating them. Something no one seemed to have ever taught Alex.

"Shit, darling, are you crying?" Mike gasped, hurriedly making his way to me and pulling me into a loving embrace that made me feel protected and hidden away from all the horrors and the woes of everything terrible thing that had ever occurred in my life.

"I want you up here with me." I whispered, as the tears spilled from my eyes and trickled daintily down my face.

The arms laced beneath my armpits tightened even more around my small body and I felt myself being drawn closer to the only person I could ever imagine loving for the rest of my life. "If that's what you want, of course I will. Why are you so sad? Did I upset you?"

I let out a single laugh in disbelief at Mike's obvious bewilderment to the fact that he could actually make me feel joy. Disentangling myself from him, but only for a moment so that I could look into his eyes, I placed my hands on either side of that high-cheekboned face I was sure must have been carved by angels. "No, baby." I breathed out, a huge smile I was almost sure was covering my whole face as I did so, "I'm happy! For the first time in months, I'm completely and totally happy. Do you honestly have any idea how much I love you?"