"Dick, get out." I stood, not giving Dick my attention.
"Talia, we were just talking." He mimicked my action but I felt his eyes on me. "It was nothing more."
"You were going to kiss me." Tears prickled my eyes. "Please, just go. You have a way of making things worse than they already are."
"So you're kicking me out because both of your boyfriends are jealous?" He smirked, knowing exactly what to say to irk me. He was turning back into the same Dick that he used to be when we tried to be friends after we broke up. He was such a manipulative bastard. And I fell for it every fucking time.
"Fuck off, Dick!" I shouted, but my voice cracked with tears.
"If that's what you want." I watched him as he slammed the door behind him, rattling the few picture frames I had hanging nearby.
I grabbed a vase of flowers, that was placed on my desk, tossing it at the door. I dropped to the floor, leaning back against my bed, as the glass collided with the wood, shattering. I was going to need to clean that later but I had no motivation to do so, I only wanted to cry and let out this frustration.
"Talia?" I heard my mothers voice chirp from behind my door.
"Go away!" I yelled. It was her fault this happened. It was her fault for letting Dick in. If she wasn't so stupid sometimes, she would understand why I wanted nothing to do with him. I couldn't believe I was even warming up to him, I couldn't believe I even forgave him. I promised myself to never forgive him, but promises were meant to be broken and never say never, right?
"Talia," She opened the door, her eyes darting to the broken glass and flowers scattered upon the floor then darting them to me. "What's going on, Talia?"
"I told you to go away!" I stood back up, walking to the other side of my bed, clutching a pillow as some sort of defense mechanism. My mom carefully tiptoed around the glass until she came into contact with only carpet.
"Why did you do this to the beautiful roses Ashton bought you?"
"Mom, why would you let Dick in?" I asked in response.
"Richard brought you food. He was being nice. The least you could do was the same."
"Dick and I are no longer a thing. He ruined me and you're well aware of that."
"I'm sorry..."
"No, you aren't!" I threw my pillow at nothing in particular. "Now I have to explain to Ashton AND Luke why they walked in on Dick almost kissing me. So, thank you mom." I laughed at the situation and how pathetic it was. "Thank you so much."
"I'm really sorry."
"If you don't mind, I would like to be left alone now."
She took the same careful tiptoed steps out of my room, closing the door with ease.
The tears began pouring again, this time they were tears full of anger. Nothing good lasted forever and that was what was utterly fucked up in this world.
-
two days later
"Have you talked to Ashton or Luke?" I was sitting in the living room, catching up on a few shows. Xander made himself comfortable next to me and began asking tons of questions that I just wasn't in the mood to answer. I hadn't done much since the incident. I lacked the energy to do anything. I could bring myself to shower and wash up, occasionally eat but other than that I just wanted to lie around and sulk. Neither Ashton or Luke had reached out to me and I hadn't reached out to them. Things were lonely without them but what was I supposed to say them?
In a sense, I felt worse about things with Ashton than Luke. Ashton might have had flashbacks to Sarah when he walked in on what he saw and that pained me. I didn't want to be the same as Sarah. I wasn't sure if there was a way to even make him or Luke believe the truth. Frankly, I was more worried about having Ashton know the truth than Luke. For Ashton I would fight, for Luke I was giving up.
"No." Was all I said. I shut the TV off, then began strolling to my room. I was back in my depressive state and I was taking it out on Xander, when he had nothing to do with this. But that was the way things had been for awhile, I got into these phases and took it out on everyone around me unintentionally.
"Talia, what's up?" Xander knocked on my door before allowing himself entrance. "Tell me what's wrong..." He sat at the foot of the bed. I was curled up in the middle, hugging one of the numerous pillows.
"Nothing happened."
"T."
"I'm fine."
"Did you and Ashton break up?"
"No, I don't know."
"Then?"
"Can you just leave me alone? Jesus Christ, Xander."
"I know deep down inside you wanna talk about it, so spill." He crossed his legs. "You've been outrageously rude to me for the last two days, but I'm not taking it personally because I know you're going through something. You only get like that when you get into one of your moods..."
"Mom let Dick in to bring me dinner, we were talking and he was about to kiss me and Luke and Ashton walked in right before that happened and they're both upset with me." I said quietly, almost in a childish tone.
"They'll come around, they always do." Xander said like he was so sure that they would.
"And if they don't?"
"They will. Trust me." Xander's words made me feel semi-better.
"I feel like shit."
"You know what will make you feel better?"
"A positive attitude, binging on junk food, and hanging out with me - just the two of us."
"I'm not sure about the positive attitude, but I'll take you up on hanging out and binging."
