Thinking of YOU...

Chapter 19- They just know my name not my story

Janine's POV

Many people will hate me for insisting myself to him.

Many people will think I'm so stupid for loving someone who can't love me back.

Many people will not understand me if I chose to fight for him 

Many people will think I'm selfish for doing crazy things just to have him

No one has the right to judge me because no one really knows what I have been through.

They might have heard the stories, but they didn’t feel what I felt in my heart.

I'm waiting for my husband. Yes, I'm trying my best to win his heart but what can I get in exchange? Well my heartbreaks into pieces every time he rubbed into my face that I'm not good enough because I'm not her. I'm not Lorrien Madrigal, the only girl he wants to love until the day he dies. Imagine, how hard for me to live with the person I love, but he can't love me back. Every time  I looked in the mirror I have question in my mind " what's wrong with me?". My ghad I never been insecure in my entire life until I fell in love with him.

But no one can blame me from hoping that one day he will realize my worth.

That one day he will be able to see that I can love him more than anyone else can do.

Every day of my life I'm convincing myself that one day he will love me the way I love him.

What else can I do I'm madly in love with him and I can't afford to lose him.

I'm willing to be the bad person here as long as I have him in my side.

*CALL ME MAYBE*

I got my phone to answer the call. It's from Lorrien

" Hello "

(I'm here in front of your house I'm with Efreem, we need to talk)

"Okay, just a minute"

Kinabahan naman ako kaya pinuntahan ko na sila. Magkasama pa rin sila hanggang ngayon? I will kill that bitch, ang kapal ng mukha niyang pumunta sa pamamahay ko kasama ang asawa ko.

" what are doing with my husband, I guess you're not doing anything behind my back?

" You know me Janine I don't do that kind of stuff, it's just that someone called me and ask me to fetch Efreem in the bar because he's already drunk and he's making some scene there"

" Oh, Thank you so much for bringing home my husband I really appreciate your effort, but next time don't bother to do it again I think it's better if you just call me because it's my job because I'm his wife, remember?"

"Janine I think I need to tell you that  Efreem talked to me and told me a lot of things"

" like what?"

" he told me that he's still in love with me"

" Oh, really just don't take it seriously my dear. And, I guess it's already clear to you that it's no longer you "

"I don't want to accuse you or anything, but I saw sincerity in his eyes when he's telling that to me and I know he's not happy with you"

"so what are you trying to say?

" I just want to know the truth"

" what truth huh?"

" I think I deserve to know the truth about the reason behind your marriage with him?"

"  Oh common we love each other that's the reason. I think you're just hallucinating or anything just go home"

" No I won't go anywhere unless you tell me the truth Please Janine I deserve to know the truth"

" I already told you the truth, you just have to accept it and move on. For Pete's sake just go home and don't make any scene here because if you do so I won't hesitate to call the security."

 Pinuntahan ko na si Efreem sa kotse ni Lorrien.

"Hon, Let me help you, you're so drunk" I told him. I tried to offer myself for a help

"Don't touch me. I don't need your help I can take care of myself. Lorrien Lorrien where are you?"

Lorrien na naman For Pete's sake ako nasa harapan mo pero iba pa rin hinahanap mo Efreem. Kelan ba dadating yung panahon na ako na yung kakailanganin mo I thought

Hindi ko na lang siya pinansin at tinulungan ko pa rin siyang makapasok sa bahay nmin. Ayaw ko ng pahabain pa masyado ako rin masasaktan sa huli.

Bago kami tuluyang makapasaok sa bahay  namin humarap ako kay Lorrien.

" I don't care if I may sound bitch here, but I'm warning you stay away from my husband or else I will ruin your life no one can stop me, I can do that and I used to do that to those bitches who are blocking my way.

*********

Nandito na kami sa room namin at binibihisan ko siya kasi amoy alak. Hinawakan ko yung mukha niya. Alam kong hindi ako magsasawang titigan ang mukha ng taong mahal ko. I touched his long lashes, pointed nose and irresistible lips.

 His irresistible lips I'm dying to kiss that lips. I thought

Before I could stop myself from thinking about his irresistible lips, I found myself kissing his forehead, nose and now his lips. I was shocked when he responded to my kisses. He held my nape to deepen our kiss.

He slipped his tongue into my mouth and our tongues wrestled. I smiled with the thought that we are sharing a passionate kiss.

 He kissed my lips, my neck, my shoulder, my ears as if putting a mark in every part of my body.

"Oh my GOD, I really love you...

LORRIEN

I felt waterworks rolled down to my cheeks. I pushed him and I cover my face with my bare hands I can't stop myself from crying. The sudden, deep pain in my heart was so bad.

He hugged me and told how sorry he was, but it's not enough to make the pain I'm feeling right now to fade away.

Now I can't stop myself from thinking if I really made the right choice to marry the person who is in love with somebody else

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Hello sorry kung ngayon lng nkapag update

ngprelims kasi kami hahah

hayan anu masasabi niya sa chapter na to

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