I don't wanna live forever

393 12 10
                                    

word count 1732

Taylors P.O.V

it had been multiple months since I had seen Calvin or Joe, Joe and I had another fall out although he begs for his forgiveness.Calvin had given me everything a girl could dream of in hope to win me back.After all this drama my reputation was fuming and nobody was there to help me. I had to take Harper out of school, due to an older girl picking on her because of the number of boyfriends I've had and saying that Harper would turn out like me when she grows up.it had been an emotional 2 months I had no support apart from a 5-year-old who didn't know what to do or say. she didn't know what was wrong with me and Joe took custody of her .My mom and dad were infuriated with me for not forgiving either of them I had no idea what to do anymore.

later that night....

tonight I was having suicidal thoughts I wanted to put them to good use but I had a daughter to raise and care for a husband if you could even .call him that.I had sat on my bathrooms cold tiled floor for over 48 hours in hope of someone to save me but nobody was there. After hours of thoughts, cries, worries I decided to be the strong independent woman I was and care for myself I didn't need a man to look after me all I needed is myself.

I turned on my nearly dead, shattered iPhone and cleared all the messages people sent me mostly from Joe and Calvin the cold breeze wrapped around me as I started to reply to the messages  as I wrote out the first reply to Calvin in 2 months I could see he was typing back my heart was spazzing he was waiting for this waiting for me. At this point, I was in total panic The thoughts span around my head 'what if still wants me'  'what if he comes over'  'what happens if Joe finds out'  

I had promised Joe that I wasn't and hadn't talked to Calvin, as I quickly shut my phone off holding it to my chest, I felt a vibration it was tree she had sent a screenshot of a notification saying my phone had turned on. my team is tracking my phone 24/7 they can see what apps, websites im on.I had to buy another phone and make another icloud to keep my team out of this it was honestly tressing to know whatever I did they could see.I decided to reply to Joes message as Calvin was still typing 

T : hows harper💗

J : wait omg you replied ,love we have missed you so much

T : my question?

J : shes doing better than she ever was😉😉😉

T : umm you guys wanna come over??

my heart beated way to fast as I sent the, I couldn't belive what I just asked them 2 months I hadnt seen him and this man and my daughter could change.Change the way I feel about myself and my attitude towards life after taking a long sigh I felt the viabration of my phone.Shaking I picked it up turning it over I stared at the screen

J : UMM OF COURSE WHAT TIME WE WILL BE THERE were smiling ear to ear to ear love you tay- tay my bae😘😘😘😍😁😁

T : 5:00 pm I'll cook :)

J : sounds good missed you and your wonderful cooking

I sighed and slumped against the counter I was completely petrified about harper she probably doesn't even like me anymore ever since Joe had taken custody of her I felt like id never see her again, my life was a puzzle and she was the missing piece.

Joes P.O.V

'HARPER' I called out a sense of worry washed over my body as I didn't hear a response,to my relief I found her on the couch fast asleep cuddling with Meridith. I gently shook her  she slowly opened her eyes  'dadda' she said stretching her limbs 'bub we have to get ready' she sat up and rubbed her eyes  'where are we going' she asked I kneeled down to her level 'were going to visit someone special' she hopped off the couch 'mama' 'are we seeing mama' she started to jump up and down 'umm maybe' I replied I picked her up and placed her on my hip and walked to her room

.love that last. |jaylor|Joe Alwyn Taylor swiftWhere stories live. Discover now