HER → SINRIN

xxxix. cry

❝You're the light, you're the night. You're the color of my blood. You're the cure, you're the pain, You're the only thing I wanna touch.❞ Ellie Goulding, Love Me Like You Do

JUNG YERIN & HWANG EUNBI.

maybe it was the fact that yerin didn't see eunbi until now.

or maybe it was just her feelings that never faded away. even after numerous flings after her.

loving eunbi was something that she will never forget. yerin would get hurt a million times by doing so but will never forget.

because it was hwang eunbi.

her beautiful baby. that made her smile so hard that her cheeks hurt. the one that made her laugh with her cute antics. the girl who made her feel love.

and seeing her fall, it was like the time slowed down and her arms gripped the other's waist tightly to hold her light body.

the cuts, the bags under her eyes, how she seemed so out of it.

how can she not notice?

that eunbi was slowly crumbling down. and she couldn't do anything about it.

the person she loved was hurting so much and it hurt her more seeing how the younger's wrists were full of scars and cuts. new and old ones.

she just wanted her to be happy again. both of them.

yerin looked down at the figure and carried her bridal style and went to her car outside the studio. it was safe for the both of them since none of the press knew that she owned a car or she's learning to dance.

once both of them were seated comfortably, eunbi lying in the backseat, a blanket wrapped around her whole body, the older looked at her sleeping state and drove off.

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"ugh." eunbi woke up with a splitting headache and she put a hand in her forehead. "my god - what the fuck!" she screamed when she saw a different set of clothing on her body.

she was now wearing a pajama set that was a little bit big on her. her arms were on full display and she consciously put the blanket around her.

the girl looked around the room she was in and scrunched her nose up cutely when she realized that she had never been in this room before.

the bed she was sitting on creaked lightly when eunbi made a move of getting up.

the girl wavered slightly after standing, holding the bed's headboard for support and after a while, going outside quietly.

she heard a few rustling and sizzling and wondered if she knew who brought her here. eunbi couldn't remember anything that had happened last night, it was blurry and all she remembered was being with yerin alone.

"you're awake!"

"fuck!" eunbi shouted, startled, almost tripping on her way to the kitchen. "for goodness sake. who - yerin?" she gaped and the girl smiled slightly.

"yeah. it's me! uhm, we had a little fight last night and i kind of. . ." the older trailed off, awkwardly pointing at her.

"what?"

"eunbi. . . those." yerin calmly said and pointed at her arms.

the younger looked shocked memontarily before putting them behind her back, biting her lip. "they're nothing!"

"nothing?" the older spat out. "you have cuts! all over your wrist! and you tell me it's nothing? don't tell me -" yerin's eyes widened and eunbi avoider her gaze, feeling sorry for herself.

and one by one, the scenes started flashing back to her and eunbi looked horrified.

"eun. please. stop lying to me." yerin pleaded and turned off the stove. standing in front of her. "you can't tell me things that you know that even i wouldn't believe."

"you - you don't know anything!" she stuttered, and almost ran out of the house but her feet. won't. move.

"then tell me. tell me why. why do you do this?" yerin whispered, her voice shaking as emotions overcame her. "please. eun. i don't know -why?"

silence.

"why did you leave me?"

when the question dropped, both the girls held their breaths for a long time before letting it go.

eunbi was fighting the urge to just cry uncontrolablly and her face was in a frown. "it - it was something that was bound to happen, yerin. both of us knew that."

"well i didn't!" yerin shouted loudly, her voice echoing in the quiet house. "i need fucking answers, eunbi! i haven't seen you in three years. i don't know what could've happened to you. and suddenly you barge into my life looking like you moved on so easily and that fucking hurt me! i don't if i should be happy or not. and then i see those! your scars! and i feel bad because i should've stopped you from leaving but i didn't! hwang eunbi, i care for you so much and. . . i just don't know anymore."

eunbi's tears started to fall and she shouted back so loudly that yerin flinched, "i fucking love you! that's why i left you! because i didn't want to get in the way of everything you had worked hard on. i'm not worth anything! and this love that i shouldn't be feeling! i never stopped loving you! and these!" she showed her wrists. "we're for me to stop. because there's no reason for me to live when i'm like this. messed up. shitty. i don't deserve you. i can't -"

the younger broke down and sobbed loudly. yerin looked shocked and she sighed, taking the crying girl and putting her in her arms, hugging her tightly.

"ssh. baby. it's okay. don't cry." the taller comforted, hand in eunbi's head and pulling her close to her neck.

"i'm sorry!" eunbi cried and hugged her back tightly. "we shouldn't - your fans -"

yerin hushed her and said, "you matter most to me. i don't fucking care even if they swear at me. i love you. so much."

she heard the smaller sniffle and cry harder, nails digging hard at her waist and trying to calm her breathing down.

"i still love you, eun. never stopped. never will."

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SURPRISE!

this was supposed to be published at may 1 but i had put it up a few days before today.

a new chapter and book for my birthday which is today (april 22)!

please tell me in the comment section below what you think about it. the first chapter will be up soon too.

thank you for all the support and hope you all have a wonderful day or night :)