The fear in me

Jason

I have to tell Lukas everything. No more secrets. Holding Nay firmly in my arm, I tell him about my life and what I've learned from Sam. Lukas pulls a face when he hears that he doesn't have to kill angels to live longer. He looks depressed, as though I've said he's about to die. Nay also looks rather unhappy when she hears all the things that have happened.

I've got no idea what she's thinking now and I also have no chance at the moment to ask her. "I'm sorry!" I tell both of them, but Lukas shakes his head.

"It's not your fault, boy. I ... I honestly don't know what I can say about that. Now I could easily beat someone to death, and it's no longer one of the HA!"

"So Sam is really your brother?" Nay asks, as though she has just digested my words.

"Yes, he was the one who first brought me to you. I'm incredibly grateful to him for that."

Nay lets her head drop and whispers. "I'm so ashamed that I doubted him. But Tim was so upset when Sam spirited himself away in front of Tim's eyes. His words ... it all made sense ... we thought he was evil and had lured us to some place ... everything was so unreal ..."

"I can very well imagine that!" I gently stroke her hair away from her face and kiss her fingertips. "I'm sorry I've dragged you into this nightmare with me."

"I'm not sorry!" she sighs, and I see the passion in her eyes. A passion that quite clearly makes my life a better one.

Lukas clears his throat again" "Both of you are really sweet to look at, and I'm utterly in favour of romance, but there are lots of things to talk about."

Nay's cheeks turn red and I have to grin. Oh, how much I've missed that. It's hard to take my eyes off her, but Lukas is right, there are now more important things to talk about. "Lukas, what should we do?"

"Good question. As much as I am unwilling to do, it there's really only one thing that makes sense: we have to stop my father ... I'd never have thought I'd say that ..."

"I know exactly what you're feeling!"

"Boy, your father saved you. Mine has knowingly made me into a monster, misused me as a tool of his plans for revenge, and robbed me of my childhood. I've got no memories at all of my life before that. And my relatives have long been dead. All of my hatred for the HA was a lie ... they were only protecting themselves from us. We are the scum they thought we were. They were right from the start ..."

"You're not scum!" I shove in. "You're a good fellow – and you've deserved to live."

Lukas gives a laugh of contempt. "How am I supposed to do that? What are my chances of finding someone like Nay?"

"I don't know that, but we'll find something ... trust me ... I'd never give you up."

"Boy, you really are a beam of light in my dark life," sighs Lukas.

"And I will help you ... and Nay will too," I assure him again.

"That's good to know. Thanks! But first we have to stop my brothers. Actually I trust only Gabriel; I've got no good contacts to the others. With Gabriel there's still hope, because I know he's yearning for love. The best opportunity to stop all of them together is this evening, because then they'll all be gathered."

"That's bad ... Sam said he wants to mobilise the HA but not so early. He gave me three days."

"That's too late! The opportunity of meeting them all together comes only once in a century. Rafael would really never organise a meeting by ordering them all to come back and assembling them. He must be desperate ... and that makes him even more careless."