For Him [TomTord] [OLD EDITION]

Thoughts

Tord walked up to the two friends, they took notice of him because he was acting out of character.

he was smiling.

Tord didnt smile by his own thoughts, as they were often dark and "messed up" as his friends liked to call it.

They weren't twisted, horrible things, they were simply just,

Trains of thoughts ran by his pure emotion

Which, didn't happen to be so great all the time.

So for him to smile while thinking, it was strange.

"Hey Matt, " he waved at the ginger, who smiled in welcome. Tord gave a soft nod to the brunette. "Edd."

" Hi Tord! " Matt exclaimed with a friendly, inviting wave. The boy was a sweet and gentle as one could be, he was a narcissist, and he wasnt the sharpest tool in the shed, but he was an okay guy.

"Tord! Did you win the lottery? you've got such a grin on you're face, I would've thought you werent the Tord I know!" Edd chuckled , this one was very similar to Matt, friendly, but he could get a little upset and come off like a strict parent, friendly and loyal he was.

"I was just walking , thats all." Tord replies with a fake grin.

"Thinking about things."

" Thinking? about what? " Edd questioned, a bit concerned.  He wasn't sure why, he just was.

"Nothing." Tord responded.

"Nothing at all."

To be honest.
He was lying

=Earlier=

Tord was never calm. Always panicking, angry, sad, stressed, he could never get himself together.

Most of it coming from unresolved conflict in his head. He often tried to comply them into a list so its not just some yoyo string of problems, full of knots and loops.

he thought, of them.

He was an orphan. What a pity.

His real parents? currently gone.

His eyes?
Different.

His confidence?
Low.

His self love?
Nonexistent.

All of this
only being a small fraction of the real mess he delt with on a daily basis

'Don't tell me your forgetting it.' He thought

'How could you forget it'

'Are you scared of dying, Tord?'

'What about violence?'

'What about blood?'

'What about murder.'

'How many times have you tried forgetting this to trick yourself into thinking you're a good person-'

Stop it.

'You've never done anything that makes you decent.'

'Your a blank slate.'

'How interesting.'

he wondered if he was a psychopath.

Certainly a normal person wouldn't argue with themselves to this extent.