Polygraph Eyes // Yungblud

11: "Cuts On Your Eyes"

I eventually grew more tired of living as each day went on. After everything I tried to do, I still ended up at square one, even more miserable than I was before. My eyes stung from the constant crying for hours upon end. I laid on my bed facing towards the window, not making a sound. I felt as I was practically brain dead. No thoughts ran through my mind, I wasn't functioning right, I just wasn't me. My mom went to move in with her sister and left me to rot here alone. I don't blame her though. I would want to leave as soon as I got the chance. Maybe today was that day.

I heard my door creek open and light footsteps rolled through the carpet. My bed indented besides me and I knew what time it was. I became stiff as Jon wrapped his arm around me. I didn't want to feel his touch. His hugs weren't comforting like Dominic's, they brought me agony.

"Good morning princess, are your ready for some 'us' time?" He started planting kisses and smirked against my neck. I hated this. I was being tortured in the comfort of my own home. It felt like a prison now. I couldn't even go to the kitchen without feeling an overwhelming sense of tension on my shoulders.

"No." I said faintly as I scooted away from him.

"What did you say?" You could tell by his tone that he was growing agitated.

"I said no." I stayed lifeless on the bed.

He let out a frustrated groan and stood up off the bed.

"You never give me what I want!" He shouted and pushed my body onto the floor. I landed with a loud thud. There was an unbearable pain in my wrist. I pushed myself to get up. That was it, I couldn't take it anymore. I unleashed all the anger that I had bottled up inside.

"I've had enough!" I screamed. Jon was taken aback a bit, but still stood his ground.

"My life has been complete shit ever since you came back, and I can't let you take me for granted anymore. I want you out of my life!" I stomped, not caring if my downstairs neighbors heard me.

"It's not that easy to get rid of me, princess" he said to me with gritted teeth and yanked my hair. I was inches apart from his face, I could feel his breath beating on my face.

"Then I'm leaving." I said as I punched him in the stomach which made him reflex and hold his abdomen. I ran past him as fast as I could, not caring about anything I left behind. It no longer had sentimental value to me. I grabbed my car keys and pushed my way down the stairs. The hot concrete burned underneath my bare feet as I ran to my parking space.

I was out, but not free. I knew I wouldn't get rid of him for good. Eventually he would come and find me, but I didn't care about that right now. I just needed to get away from here. I need to get to a place that holds so much value and memories to me. Park Hill.

                                            ***

As I saw the neon 'I Love You, Will You Marry Me" sign appear over the hill, I knew I was home free, for now at least. I cried happy tears and laughed as the sign became clearer and the distance between it grew shorter. I parked my car and rested my head on the wheel. I let out a long breath that has been held in since the first time I saw Jon again. It was over for a little while and I was grateful just to get a little escape from him. I exited my car and headed to the tree that Dominic and I shared our first real memory. That day I knew that I would be in love with him, but it was too late now. He didn't want to see me again.

I sat in the shade that the tree was casting and just stared into the distance. Although I didn't know him for long, Dominic had made a permanent place in my heart. He was everything I needed. Smart, kind, caring and so much more. I brought my knees up to my chest as I thought about how I wished I could see him just one more time.

"Is this spot taken." I heard a voice in front of me.

I peeked up to see Dominic. He looked horrible. His hair was messier than ever, his eyes were dark and filled with sadness, he looked sick.  I shook my head without saying a word. He planted himself on the grass next to me. We sat there in silence for a few moments, nothing but the wind was making a sound.

"Why?" He asked.

"Why what?" I looked at the ground and picked at the grass.

"Why didn't you call? Why didn't you want me here? Just why?" He said scratching at the back of his hand.

I laughed to myself, "there is no why. It was simply based all out of my own stupidity."

"You're not stupid." Dominic let out a sigh.

"Yes I am. I let the best thing that has ever happened to me slip away through my fingers," I stopped to breathe and calm down, "I stayed under my abusers command, I took countless of beatings and didn't ask for help. Most importantly, I lost you. That was the thing I regretted the most."
I looked at him with tears forming in my eyes. I explained to him everything that happened. From the minute he dropped me off and all the way until where we were now.

"So you did it to protect me?" He asked. I nodded again not saying a word.

"Lex, you risked yourself and your sanity for me. It hurts me that I wasn't there for you." He scooted closer to me.

"It's not your fault. Not only did he not want you there, I didn't. It's not that I don't like you or anything, because that is not the case, I just didn't want to see you in pain. I can now see how ultimately we both ended up hurt. When you said you weren't going to come back, it hurt a lot and I wanted to stop you and have you take me away from here, but I care about you too much to see you suffer."  I admitted.

"Why stop here?" He raised an eyebrow as he looked in my direction. I met his gaze and was more confused than ever.

"Come on tour with me,"  He grabbed my hands, "I'll take you anywhere you want to go."

I was shocked at his remark but nothing held me back from putting a smile on my face, "I don't care where we go, as long as I'm with you."

He returned the smile and tackled me with kisses in the grass. He met my lips and kissed me with more  passion than I ever felt before. I was truly in love with this boy.

"You don't know how long I've been wanting to do that." He smiled as he hovered over me.

"What's stopping you?" I placed my hands on his cheeks and placed my lips on his. He smiled against each kiss.

We laid in the grass next to each other, trying to catch our breaths. It felt like nothing in the world could harm us. I felt infinite.