Little Things

Chapter 47

The next few weeks were an emotional blur. Robin's funeral was a week after he passed away. Anne mostly planned everything, despite Gemma and Harry's offers for help. I knew it was hard on her, but she was stubborn like Harry and didn't want any assistance from anyone.

I tried to be there for Harry as best as I could, but he kept to himself mostly. I tiptoed around him, not wanting to upset him further. He mainly spent his time writing a eulogy for Robin. I couldn't imagine having to consolidate an entire relationship with someone into a single speech.

"Harry," I said quietly on the day of Robin's funeral.

"Hm?" he replied.

"Can you zip me up?" I asked. It was getting harder to find clothes that I could put on myself; Matthew was going to be born in about two months and I was growing every day.

Harry nodded silently and walked out of the bathroom to zip my dress up. Once he did, he wrapped his arms around me from behind and rested his hands on my bump. I sighed at his embrace.

"I'm sorry I've been so detached," Harry whispered.

"You have no reason to be sorry, my love," I replied, turning my head to look at him.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

Gemma knocked on the door gently before opening it.

"It's time to get going," she said. Harry and I nodded and I went to Elizabeth's room to get her. She was asleep in her crib in her black dress and black shoes. I picked her up gently and grabbed the baby bag before meeting Harry and Gemma at the car.

The car ride was mostly silent, minus Elizabeth's interspersed babbling. I smiled softly at her and silently thanked her for being a little beacon of humor and joy in the midst of all of this. I looked at Harry through the rearview mirror and saw him cracking a fraction of a smile at our daughter's babbling.

The funeral went by quickly and tearfully. Elizabeth slept through most of it, which I was thankful for. Afterwards, Harry, Gemma, Anne and I gathered back at the house to eat one final meal before we all returned back home. I felt awful for leaving Anne by herself, but Harry, Gemma and I had lives, and Harry and I had a dog being watched by one of our neighbors that we needed to care for.

"We'll call you as soon as we get to London," Harry promised Anne. He gave her a tight hug and she kissed her son's cheek. I hugged her as well and handed her Elizabeth for a bit so she could say goodbye to her.

"I'll talk to you both soon," Anne said as we left her house.

"We love you," Harry replied.

"I love you both very much."

The ride home was fairly quiet. It was a more comfortable silence than the ride to the funeral. Harry rested one of his hands on my baby bump while keeping the other one on the steering wheel.

"Do you want to stop and get something to eat before we get home?" I asked. "I'm not sure what we have in the fridge."

"Then we should probably go grocery shopping," Harry said quietly. He parked the car in the lot of a grocery store and helped me out of the car. We got Elizabeth strapped into her stroller before entering the store. We bought our groceries and managed to avoid any fans asking questions. One fan, however, didn't ask for any pictures; all she asked was if Harry and I were doing alright and if she could have a hug from Harry. I could tell he appreciated not having to smile for pictures at that time.

Harry and I tried to get on with our lives as best as we could without Robin. We returned to our schedule with Harry recording and writing all day while I stayed home with Elizabeth and worked on orders for my online shop. He began to open up more and more as the weeks went on and before I knew it, he was as close to his old self as he was ever going to be. I knew that without Robin a piece of Harry's heart was missing; that's how it was for all of us. But he was cracking jokes and spending time with Elizabeth again. He was also helping me prepare for Matthew.