To many mistakes

ch. 10

On our way towards the woods, we were silent. Just his heavy stomping and my low breathing. "Rick" I say. He's obviously deep in thought bcuz he didn't even hear me."rick?" I try again. This time he looks back slightly but looks foward again. "Hmm, oh ya?" He asks not stopping from walking.

He don't even know where's he's going. "Rick, stop!" I say raising my voice. Surprisingly he does what i said. "What do I have to do kelsey, huh? What do i have to do" he says making me confused. "What do you mean ricky?" I ask. "To have u" he states making me freeze.

"Rick i-" I begin but he cuts me off. "Just tell me if you want me or not, so I don't get any more attached." "I dont" I say quietly. Of course it was a lie. I liked Rick, like a lot. I looked up to see hurt on his face and his jaw clenched. He nods and looks back being his shoulder.

I wouldn't want nothing more than to be with him, but it's for his safety. He's too good for me. "Alright then, glad that's settled." Although it was far from settled. He began walking back towards my way slightly bumping shoulders as he passes. My mouth was slightly open and I about let a tear drop. Till I wiped it away. Refusing to cry over a man.

I followed back pretty far but close enough so I could see Rick. I stop and close my eyes. As soon as I did I remembered my dad. Him saying I could never be happy. I guess he was wright. I see and feel all the bad things he has did to me. I start crying.  No! I open my eyes not seeing rick any where. I think he's already home.

I ran home. Passing rick. Going to the bathroom and shutting the door, locking it. I take out my knife and take off my hoodie. I promised my only friend, sayler, I wouldn't do it any more. But she was now dead, and promises don't mean shit anymore.

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I cut over my already scared wrist. the blood dripping down it. I wiped the blood off. Rinsed my wrist and didn't even bother wasting the gauze to cover it up. All I did was put back on my hoodie. I look in the mirror to see me still tan and slim. I gotten slightly skinnier do to not eating as much, then again, I never did anyway.

I grab the brush and brush my long black hair that reached my hips. I looked in the mirror again and stared at my dark chocolate colored eyes. I pull my hair up into a loose ponytail. I walk out of the bathroom to see rick standing there. I don't even flinch. "Why the-" he was interrupted by a splashing sound. Like a drop hit the floor, my heart stopped.

Please don't let that be my blood. I looked down slightly to see a drop of blood. As soon as Rick is about to look down I step on it and say "I left the water dropping" I turn on my heels rubbing my foot in the floorboard trying to get it off as much as I can. I hold on my sleeve harder pressing it against my cuts.

I go back in the bathroom and act like I'm turning it off all the way. I quickly raised my arm up and rinsed what I could. Even earning a little squeak from it bcuz I was pushing it hard to turn it off. I turn around to see a very pissed looking Rick. I put my arms behind me and say "yes?" Pretty high and squinting my eyes.

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