Elena's Fantasy Diaries

I'm Coming

Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to The Vampire Diaries, TV show or books. However I decided to have a little play around with the characters (I would definitely like to play with Damon).

Dear Diary

Another night, another dream about Damon. This time we were in a situation for real at the boarding house where something could have happened between us, and nearly did, I almost initiated it, but we were interrupted. In my dream the interruption didn't stop us from taking it further. In real life, I don't have the confidence to do what I do in my dreams with Damon. But I'll get onto that part later.

After Damon and Stefan ran into Mikael, we decided to get rid of Klaus at the Homecoming dance. Stefan agreed to help us so that he could gain his freedom back. I also managed to convince Rebekah to help us.

Mikael was supposed to taunt Klaus with me, or Katherine pretending to be me. We daggered Rebekah to keep her from betraying us. Stefan was to be kept out of it so that Klaus couldn't get the truth from him using compulsion.

Everything was going fine until for some reason Stefan managed to escape and betrayed us by saving Klaus from being staked by Damon. Klaus killed Mikael with the white oak stake and our only chance of killing Klaus disappeared. Klaus apparently released Stefan from his obligation to be his servant and Stefan disappeared along with Katherine.

When Damon got back he was really pissed off. I've never seen him so angry. Yet this time he didn't scare me, because I knew he'd never hurt me and he just needed someone to help calm him down. Someone who knew him and who understood what he was going through.

I took hold of him and managed to calm him down really quickly. He went from angry to sad in the blink of an eye. I think he was more sad for me than himself. He'd wanted to get Stefan back, but he has all eternity for that, I'm not a vampire so I don't have that luxury. He was doing it to make me happy even though he was breaking his own heart along the way.

When it comes to me, Damon is selfless. He is only interested in my happiness, even if it means me being with someone else. His selflessness when it comes to me, stuns me at times. And as much as I deny it, that side of Damon is one that I love, even if it is a little selfish of me. Nobody else loves me in the same way he does. It's very passionate, almost consuming, and I think it's beginning to rub off on me. I just can't shake the feeling that being around Damon always feels right. And when he's not there, I feel alone.

How time changes things. A year ago I was terrified of being around Damon, now I'm terrified of not being around him. He makes me feel strong and independent, like I can fight back. Yes he still is constantly making sure I am safe, but he knows I am able to take care of myself, at least around some humans, and maybe even being able to surprise a vampire or two. He gives me a sense of empowerment. That he actively encourages it is another thing I love about him.

Anyway, on to my dream. It was after the Homecoming dance which didn't quite happen. Damon got back after Stefan betrayed us and Damon was in a rage. I calmed him down. But instead of us parting ways after we were interrupted, my Damon sexual fantasy mind took over.

This is my fifth dream about Damon in less than 2 weeks. Yes okay 2 dreams were in one night, but it's becoming a more regular thing. Admittedly things have been a little intense lately, but I've never had this many in such a short space of time. I keep saying I'm not in love with him, then sometimes I think I might be falling for him. I know it has been the thought of Stefan which has held me back, but after what happened last night, it's no longer an issue. I'll leave it for the time being, see if anything happens between us. If Damon tries to kiss me, I won't stop him. Maybe that would stop the dreams. Although, part of me enjoys the dreams, especially at a time when I'm not in a sexual relationship with anyone. So I don't know if I want them to stop. I guess you could say I'm being selfish and getting the best of both worlds. Being with someone who I could have but I guess I'm too afraid to admit to wanting him to him and my friends, because I know they wouldn't approve. These are major complications. On the other hand, because they are dreams, I don't have any of the said complications. I also get to have this amazing fantasy sex life with Damon.