Chapter 13: Guess pedestals aren't for everyone

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“Oh fuck!” Ian moaned.

I simply raised an eyebrow, still taking in the whole situation.

He sighed, “What’re you doing here?!” he was damn near yelling.

“With a few friends..” I replied reluctantly.

“Oh of COURSE YOU ARE!” Yep he was yelling now. “Look, if you want to be screwed so badly, we could take care of that right now. Would you drop it, then??!”

Did Ian Bowen just say that? Did he? Did he?! Yes he did.

“Drop what?” I sounded surprisingly calm, looking into his almost bloodshot eyes.

“THIS!”

“What?”

“Stop FOLLOWING ME AROUND!” if possible, his voice got louder.

“I am not following you around, Ian.”

“OH GOD! SHE SAYS THE NAME!”

“Would you just please calm down?”

“Now she says PLEASE! You listen to me! You can STOP following me around because I am not yours! I am not the fifth grader you met and fell for, okay?! I’m really not. I’m sorry okay?! Oh, wait, I’m not! Just stop following me!”

I cocked my head to the side. He knew? He knew?! He knew?! How did he ever find out! My eyes widened for a second, but I reminded myself that I had to be the calm one in this situation, because Ian sure as hell wasn't gonna be. So, even though all I wanted was for me to shout and scream and slap him, I didn't. Because screw the offence, I had to be calm. He was drunk and I was a little scared. But not scared enough to say what I said next. 

“Look here, mister. I am not following you around. I didn’t even know you’d be here. You’re drunk. You’re stupider than I thought. You’re crazy, and not at all appealing right now. So about the screwing? I think I’ll pass. Because if I really strike you as a desperate slut, then I suggest you look in the mirror once in a while.” 

What? I said I couldn't lose it, not that I couldn't be rude. Though I still couldn't believe I said that to his face.

I stayed put on the bed, the bowl of Cheetos still in my lap. He didn’t move, either. Trust me, there was nothing more I wanted than to get out of there, but really, the atmosphere outside wasn’t the best. I wanted him to yell at me more so that I could fight with him and let it all out. Also, I wanted to know what he had to say to me. After all these years, he had something to say, not the best of things, I admit, but it was still something.

“Oh, I’ve looked in the mirror alright, only to see a handsome seventeen year old, not a 10 year old fifth grader! Get over me!”

“Who said I ever liked you?” lying once in a while didn’t hurt.

“It was pretty obvious.”

And then it struck me. Yes, I’m slow. Ian had known all along about my feelings for him. He’d known all along, and had still chosen to ignore me. In fact, he’d ignored me because I had feelings for him. Suddenly, the High School Crush didn’t look as handsome as ever, the High School Crush didn't look perfect, the High School Crush fell down from the highest pedestal. Suddenly, the High School Crush didn't really look like the High School Crush. Guess pedestals aren’t for everyone.

Being calm didn't seem like the biggest priority now.

“So let me get this straight: you knew all along? You knew?! YOU FUCKING KNEW?! And you still ignored me!! You IGNORED me IAN! What is WRONG WITH YOU?! You knew all freaking along, and you didn’t, in the least, ever try to talk to me, or even look at me! You…you’re…you’re a LOSER!”

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