I Couldn't Say No

814 23 6
                                    

Description: JJ couldn't speak so he couldn't say no.

TW: Mentions of rape and implied depression.

JJ rarely went out on his own but everyone needs alone time every once in a while. The household was in need of some milk so he happily offered to go fetch some from the shop that was at the end of their road. It shouldn't have been anything more than a five minute walk.

The sun had set a while ago since winter evenings were dark and cold. JJ just had a waistcoat on because he hadn't expected to be out for too long. He had his bowler hat to protect him from the tiny snowflakes in the air but that was it in terms of protection from the weather. He headed out into the dark, being reminded by his friends that he should 'come straight back'.

There was a thin layer of white on the ground, meaning that he left footprints in the ground. The only source of light was the streetlights that were lighting up the path and illuminating his steps. He made it to the shops with no trouble, knowing exactly where the milk was after having visited the shop so many times. He picked up the bottle and headed to the counter, placing it down and holding out the exact amount of money. The cashier took the cash and smiled gently. Her smile vanished when JJ didn't thank her but he didn't think anything of it as he took the milk and left the shop.

He was just walking around the corner through an alley way since it was a shortcut back to his house. It was probably fairly stupid of him, considering it was dimly lit and so JJ could barely see a metre in front of him. About half way, he felt a hand grab his arm and pull him backwards. He stumbled, eyes wide and mouth open but he couldn't scream. He couldn't do anything.

-

"JJ's taking an awfully long time?" Marvin muttered to himself after almost an hour had passed since the silent man had left. The others nodded, faces pale with concern.

"Maybe we should go out looking for him. I'm sure everything's fine but just in case..." Chase replied, getting up without waiting for the others to reply.

"I'll come with." Jackieboy Man also got up onto his feet and followed Chase to get his shoes on.

-

When they found JJ, he was shivering violently and staring into space. His waistcoat was loosely pulled over himself and he was hugging his knees tightly. "JJ?" Jackieboy Man spoke quietly, bending down to his height. He was used to speaking to victims that felt vulnerable and afraid so he knew exactly what precautions to take. "Can you tell us what happened?" JJ didn't reply, not even with a shake of his head; he just continued to blankly stare into space. It was like he wasn't there. Jackieboy Man gently laced his hands into JJ's and pulled him to his feet.

JJ appeared drunk or in some sort of daze as he stumbled down the path. Chase took his other hand to help keep him steady. It took them almost double the time to get home because JJ was walking slowly and kept tripping over his own feet. Once they finally arrived, Marvin and Henrik met them at the door. "Everything okay?" Henrik questioned but he knew the answer as soon as his eyes laid upon a trembling JJ. "Are you hurt?"

JJ shook his head rapidly, shoving Chase and Jackieboy Man away and heading straight upstairs. The sound of the shower then filled the house.

When too much time passed for JJ to be alright in the bathroom, Jackieboy Man headed upstairs again. He knocked gently on the door, the shower having stopped awhile ago so it was definitely heard. He gently opened the door and said, "I'm coming in so make sure you're in a towel or whatever!" He waited another minute or so before stepping inside.

The first thing he saw was JJ, sitting on the floor of the bathroom and hugging his knees against his chest. He was crying silent tears and his arms were bright red, as if they had been rubbed raw. "Oh, JJ..." Jackieboy Man mumbled, helping JJ up once again. He guided him to his bedroom and laid him down on his bed. He pulled the covers up over him, as if JJ was a little kid that he needed to look after.

-

JJ continued to act strangely. He didn't make any sort of effort to communicate (not even sign language) and he rarely left his room. He cried often and it broke the other egos' hearts every time they found him during one of his breakdowns.

After a week, they had had enough of watching one of their friends suffer so Chase volunteered and headed into JJ's room. JJ was lying in bed, staring up at the ceiling with a blank expression on his face. "JJ, you need to tell us what's going on," He started, waiting for him to reply but continuing when he didn't. "We won't judge you, I hope you know that. You can tell me and I won't tell the others if that's what you want. Just please, trust me," Chase leaned forward and placed his hand on JJ's but he flinched away. Chase then backed up, a little hurt. "I'm not going to laugh or hurt you, no matter what it is."

JJ slowly moved his hands to sign, 'I can't.'

"You can though. What's stopping you? You shouldn't bottle things up like this because I can help. The others can help too. Is there someone else you'd rather talk to?"

'No. When I was walking home through the alleyway,' JJ's hands were extremely shaky and Chase couldn't help but watch them move with a frown on his face. 'It was dark so I couldn't see. Then someone grabbed me.' JJ stopped and rapidly shook his head, eyes filling with tears. He shoved Chase so hard that he stumbled backwards and fell but he quickly got back up.

"You can continue, JJ. I'm going to help you feel better, okay?"

'I couldn't scream because of my voice and I was so scared. They just started to... Chase, please go away.'

Chase moved closer and placed a hand on JJ's shoulder but it was shaken off. JJ then lashed out, thrusting a fist forward and hitting Chase square in the face. "Shit, dude!" He yelled, his hand moving to hold his nose that was profusely bleeding.

'I'm sorry. I saw... Get out, Chase.'

"I can't do that," Chase's voice was muffled by his hand but JJ could still understand him clearly. "I want to be there for you. I'm not going to hurt you. You just need to open up so we can do something to make you feel better."

'I couldn't say no so technically it wasn't...'

"Wasn't..?"

'Rape.' The word lingered in the air for a moment and it made Chase's heart skip a beat. He stared at JJ in complete horror, unsure of how to react to that. JJ was sobbing, his head buried into his knees and Chase desperately wanted to hug him but he knew that would be a bad idea.

"You still didn't give consent, JJ."

'Go away. I can't talk about this.'

"Can I tell the other egos?"

'Please don't.'

"I won't but only if you promise me something. Will you report them to the police?"

'I couldn't see them. It was too dark.'

"Oh... well, will you at least see a professional about this? They might be able to give you some advice on how to cope."

'I don't want to.'

"Please, JJ. I care about you and I hate seeing you so upset like this..." JJ looked up momentarily and met Chase's pleading eyes. He ended up giving in and nodding.

'Fine.'

It isn't even 11 o'clock and I'm already 101% done with today. I left work at home and will have to go and get it at break, I need to unlock my phone (long story) and it turns out it will take double the amount of time I thought (company's fault not mine) and I'm sick but still at school. I want to hit my head against the table a million times and go back to bed.

Jacksepticeye One ShotsWhere stories live. Discover now