Bad Teacher-A Demi Lovato Fan Fiction

Bad Teacher Part 63- In Loving Memory

Demi's POV

These past 2 days I've been a mess my eyes were puffy from crying and I haven't slept since the day I went to the base Marissa has stayed with me throughout these two days and I'm grateful for that, Jeremy on the other hand he's upset about the whole thing he couldn't stop crying it was hard for us to tell him that his Momma was now in heaven looking down on him it was hard for me to even accept the fact that she's in heaven and that I'll never see my soulmate again. I walk into the bathroom and I died my hair black I thought maybe that would help me cope for a few minutes but nothing worked everything I've tried these past two days didn't help it just made me feel worse I felt numb. When I was done dying my hair I hear Marissa walking into the bathroom and she says

"Hey Dems I'm going to get the girls and bring them here that way we can go together to the memorial are you going to be okay here by yourself.?" she said

"Yeah Mar..I'll be fine just go I'll be ready when you come back." I said

"Demi..." she said in a worried tone

"Yeah Mar.?..." I said my voice was raspy from all the sobbing she walks up to me and she hugs me I began to silently cry on her shoulder something I always did since we were kids growing up she looks into my eyes and says

"No matter what today you have to be strong for Jeremy,For the girls and especially Alex..." she said my lip was quivering I bit it trying hard not to start sobbing again I nod my head and she hugs me one last time before she leaves once I hear the door shut I began sobbing again I fall on my knees and start crying I bury my head onto Alex's Letterman Jacket I hold onto it tight I can still smell her vanilla perfume on it I knew I promised Marissa I wouldn't do it anymore but I need to feel something just to let it all out I get up from the bathroom floor  and I grab the box of razors that was there I stare blankly at the piece of cold metal and before I knew it I felt the cold metal rub against my skin and before I knew it I had 4 cuts on my wrists I wiped my eyes and cleaned my wrist once I pulled myself together I decided to get ready once I'm finished I get Jeremy ready once he's finished I hear the doorbell ring I walk downstairs and I open the door and I see Stephanie in her formal military uniform I saw in her eyes that she wanted to cry but she was keeping it in I knew it was hard for her too because she saw Alex die, she looks at me and she says

"Hey Demi how are you.?" she said 

"Not doing so good I mean I haven't been myself without her I feel like my heart was ripped out and I-I don't want to do anymore." I said as I felt the tears coming back into my eyes I wiped them away and I said

"I'm sorry I just can't stop crying it's so hard to believe she's really gone.." I said she wraps her arms around me and I held onto her she gently rubs my back and said

"Demi it's okay look don't ever feel like you're alone because you're not I'll be here for you." she said

she looks deep into my eyes as I stare back at hers when I looked into her eyes I realized they were similar to Alex's they were very similar it felt like I was staring into Alex's eyes I see Stephanie lean in closer and our lips are inches apart I slowly pull away and she did the same,I smile a little bit but it soon drops my depression was getting the best of me. As it was time for us to go Stephanie walks me out with the rest of the girls I managed to cover up my wrists with make up just in case, as we drove down the street we make it to the cemetery where Alex, Zac,Riley's and Nick's memorial service was being held as we walked up the hill it was a windy September day it was cold once we finally reached the top I see dozens of men in uniform and I see Alex's dad in his uniform since he was in the service too he sees me and he walks up to me and says