babysitter g.d

thirty-two : sleep tight, indigo

author's note at the end!!! anyways, update!! love yall !!

it has been two days since indigo was born and i felt so happy to have her in my arms now. carrying her for nine months sure as hell tires the shit out of me but i'm hoping that everything will be less tiring after this. i know that being a mom wasn't easy but this is my life now.

i'm a mother to benson and indigo. being a mother has so much responsibility and i don't know how to manage it. but mom and lisa had offered to help me with how to take care of indigo.

having indigo in my arms after so long made me happy. she makes me smile whenever i see her. what kind of mother doesn't love her own children? you know, speaking about this, i wonder how surrogate mothers do this. they get pregnant with other people's baby and they had to give it to the person.

don't they feel any love for the baby?

i especially hate it comes to parents abandoning their children. why are people so heartless? if they don't want them, then, why get pregnant? if it was a criminal case like rape then that would probably be understood. but if you're married and got a child that you and your husband made, why abandon them?

i looked at my baby who was cuddled against my chest. my eyes turned blurry and i bent my head down to pecked her forehead.

"indigo, i will never stop loving you. you made me stronger in a way that i couldn't even describe. you made me want to continue living my life as per normal. your presence is very important to me. if i had lost you, i don't know what i would've done to myself. i promise that i will try to be a good mother for you. i promise that i will never abandon you. i want you to know that i have loved you ever since i first saw you on that ultrasound machine's screen." i said softly.

"mommy will always love you, indigo. i will always love you and never stop. i will tell you that i love you every day." i continued.

she started whining a little. her tiny little fingers were making their way to the top of her blanket. i put my index finger in front of her hand and she grabbed it tightly. it made me smile. just a small gesture from my little princess.

there was a knock on the door before it opened and doctor harries and grayson walked in together. they were talking about some things and were laughing. i just smiled. grayson went towards me and took indigo in his arms.

"hey, reffda. how are you doing today? any headaches or anything?" doctor harries asked, holding on to the clipboard.

"i'm fine. just a little tired is all." i responded, smiling at him.

"that's normal. alright then. in that case, do you want to go home?" i nodded my head.

i can't wait to get out of this bed. i want to go back home and sleep on the bed which is much more comfortable. i couldn't even sleep properly here maybe that's why i was tired.

"okay. i'll file in a discharge letter for you. you can get ready to go home. once it's done and signed, you can go. indigo will have her appointment every once in two weeks just to make sure she's okay. that's all."

i opened my arms for a hug. doctor harries just gave me a chuckle, accepting it. he gave me a light peck on the cheek and told me to rest well at home and make sure to eat healthily.

once he left, grayson placed indigo gently into the cot. he helped me up and packed my things into the duffel bag. he handed me my clothes and guided me to the bathroom.

"are you able to change your clothes by yourself? do you need me to help?" grayson asked, looking at me as he stood outside of the bathroom.

"i'll be fine. don't worry." i replied, kissing him on his lips softly.