The Girl in The Green Scarf

S e v e n t e e n

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
HAMSA

As we get closer to the Residential Province, a steady march of what ifs make their way through all of my hopes and now attainable dreams, slowly transforming my excitement into uncertainty.

What if the perimeter of the province is guarded and we can't get in. What if we do manage to make it inside but then get caught and locked up again, this time for good? What if once we're inside we're trapped and can't get to my province? What if nothing goes wrong and I return home, only to find that Yahiya had already given up on me and is no longer waiting for my homecoming? That he left.

I know for a fact that false hope is not something my brother is fond of. So even if giving up on me - considering me dead - and moving on hurts him, he'll end up doing it. He most probably already did; I have been gone for almost two weeks now and to Yahiya, who is all practicality and realism, being stuck with the memory of someone who is not returning is a waste.

I hate to admit that that's what is daunting me the most; eating at the edges of my heart. Not being locked up, not being trapped, not even death, but the probability of returning to an empty home. I shunt away all these insecurities and decide this is the perfect time to have faith and leave everything to the will of Allah; after all, he is who knows what is best.

"Just beyond that hill," Sebastian says, nodding his head at the hill coming up ahead of us.

"You said that about the last two hills," I say with a huff.

I know I shouldn't be complaining and charging at him, since none of this is his fault, but I didn't really get much sleep in the past twenty four hours and I tend to get cranky when my sleep is tempered with.

"Yeah, but I'm sure this is it."

"Let's hope you're right."

As we come up to the top of the hill - me panting so hard from the climb- I wonder how in the world was climbing the hill behind our house every day, a piece of cake. When I collapse on the grass trying to catch my breath, Sebastian looks at me weirdly and says,

"You make it look like we just climbed Mountain Everest."

I shoot him the dirtiest glare I can muster.

"I'm out of shape, sue me."

I stand up straight and walk forward a few feetto look around and then I gasp a little, finding myself breathless again as I take in the view. To our left and beyond the mob of trees, the bay unfolds, shimmering and sparkling under the light of the moon. And in front of us lies the Residential Province, just like Sebastian said it would, with all its glory. It is something entirely different, but still beautiful.

The first thought that crosses my mind is, Yahiya would love this. Even he who is all practicality would have his breath taken away by all of this, the height, the lights and the sensation of being above the world. Everything is glowing with lights, some are in colors that I never thought are possible for lights to be; hues of purples and greens. The buildings are high; some look like they may be more than ten stories, which I find fascinating since the tallest building around my province, excluding the Factories, is four stories high. Another thing that takes me by surprise is all the noise. Even this late at night - I have no idea what time it is, but the moon is still bright in the sky, so I deduct it's probably a little before midnight - the province is vibrant with life, and all the way over from where we're standing I can hear car honks and the unfamiliar sound of music.

I feel so relaxed, enjoying the wind at the top of the hill, which sweeps over my face, blowing my scarf and dress back. And for a second there I almost forget that Sebastian is standing a few feet behind me, which is why I nearly jump out of my clothes when he leans forward and whispers,