taetae wants love too!

TW CHAPTER // when you feel like giving up but your body says no

TW : Rape and violence and namecalling (it's kinda heavily described - and im so so sorry but i had to include that :( it'll be bolded before it starts and it lasts till the end of the fic. once again im really sorry ) 

As Seo Joon led Taehyung back to his dorm, Taehyung couldn't help but suddenly miss his bangtan members. After all, he had never really gone through a day without seeing either one of them yet. And now, he would be spending at least 3 months without them!

The sudden realisation made Taehyung's heart drop. 

Unconsciously letting out a distressed whimper, Taehyung started walking more slowly than before until he eventually trailed behind Seo Joon.

On the other hand, Seo Joon still thinking back to earlier where Taehyung showed his (baby boy tendencies) adorable side and clutched his chest. Completely falling in love with the younger as his dongsaeng, Seo Joon could not help but feel the urge to protect him grow even more stronger. 

It was at this moment where he turned to talk to Taehyung when he realised that the younger was no longer beside him. Immediately assuming the worst case scenario, Seo Joon internally panicked until he turned and saw the boy standing still. 

Sighing in relief, he power walked over and called, 'Taehyung-ah, what are you doing?' 

Seeing Seo Joon, the boy being called quickly broke out of it and broke out into a sheepish smile. 

'Seo Joon-hyung! I'm sorry, Taetae just got kinda thought-y for a bit!' Taehyung struggled to find the correct words but only ended up with that.

'Thought-y?' Seo Joon pondered for a bit, until he felt his eyes go wide, 'THOTY?' 

Swallowing his saliva, Seo Joon shook the mental images out of this head. Once again, he regained his composure and held onto Taehyung's hand - firmly, this time, and so they headed back to Taehyung's dorm once again. 

Along the way, however, it would be unsaid what Seo Joon did when Taehyung noticed his red cheeks and his worried queries lasted all the way until they both reached the dorms. 

After Seo Joon had left Taehyung with his many reassurances that he was okay, Taehyung finally felt like maybe he was overreacting and calmed back down. 

Left alone in his room for the first time, Taehyung put his stuff up in his compartments before falling back onto the bed. 

He closed his eyes and sighed. 

Thinking back to earlier where he remembered he had to see the director, he was nothing if not absolutely drained. 

Wishing that he had Bangtan here with him, Taehyung gave a small smile when he recalled back to those sweet memories he had with them. From all the times where he could play with Jimin and to those times where both him and Namjoon would tease each other, Taehyung missed them all horribly. At the thought of not being able to see them for quite some time, Taehyung couldn't help but feel his willpower waver slightly. 

'Was it really worth it? Doing this even though he couldn't see his favourite hyungies and dongsaeng?' Taehyung thought to himself, feeling doubtful.

Even then, he knew no matter what, he would stop at nothing for them. He loved them, without a doubt. 

Before he could get lost in his thoughts, he heard his phone go off. 

'Ping!'

Expecting it to be a text from Bangtan, he got up rather excitedly and snatched his phone from the nightstand. With barely contained glee, he flipped it open but felt his stomach drop at the text sent. 

'I saw you were no longer with the rest. Meet me in my office ASAP, dumb bitch.'

Taehyung saw it was from the Director, and he so badly wanted to ignore the message. He wanted to smash his phone. He wanted to do every other thing but to go there and do whatever it was the Director had been wanting to do from the very start. 

But, deep down, he knew that he had to. Despite not wanting to, despite hating the sheer thought of it, he felt relieved in a way or another because he knew that honestly it was better that it was him having to go through this instead of any of the other boys - because he knew that they would hurt so bad. 

Bearing that thought in his mind, Taehyung left his phone - face down this time, and slowly made his way to the director's office.

'Knock knock.' Taehyung rapped his knuckles on the door anxiously, squirming from side to side, visibly very nervous. 

( TW // IT STARTS HERE )

He didn't expect the door to swing open so suddenly, but it did. A rough hand pulled him in, and had immediately closed the door shut. 

Taehyung trembled, he felt like his legs were going to give out. The man pushed him against the door, pressing his body against Taehyung's. 

Taehyung moved back still, trying to put some space in between his and his assailant's body, even an inch would have been enough for him to gain enough momentum to push him off. 

Unfortunately, that didn't happen. The male pinned him down with brute strength and urgently put his lips on his. 

Taehyung felt the panic, unknowingly tears had started to stream down his face. With adrenaline fueling the sudden strength he had got, Taehyung pushed the director back with all of his strength. 

'I DON'T WANT THIS! PLEASE STOP!' Taehyung yelled with all of his might, scrambling to get up on his two feet again. 

But, the director was faster than him. 

Once again, he pulled Taehyung down, such that he was straddling Taehyung from the back. Pushing his face towards the floor, the director snarled in his ear, 'I don't care what you want. You either do this or you can say goodbye to your family, boy.'

And once again, Taehyung felt himself crippled with fear for Bangtan. They had barely started to get big so how could he start any dramas or troubles for them right now? How could he throw away all the work that his members had put in? How could he let them down like this? How could he...?

Thoughts like this filled his mind, and he slowly broke down. Taehyung surrendered. 

Feeling Taehyung stop struggling, the director grinned sinisterly. 

'That's right, whore. Give in to me.' he slapped Taehyung's face and spat at him, 'After all, I'm the only one giving you a chance to stardom right now, aren't I? So be grateful and take it, bitch.'

Feeling the tears run down his face, Taehyung couldn't help but keep begging for the man to stop. 

But, he never did. 

A/N : I'm really so fucking sorry for writing this. I swear, but this will most probably be the last so ever elaborately written scene. I just had to write this to showcase how clearly this evil this man is. Oh my god, if anyone ever feels triggered by this scene, please please talk to someone, okay? Talk to someone you trust, a professional, a friend or anything of the sort. Please. Or you can even come talk to me okay? Once again, I really sincerely apologise if I triggered any of you guys who's been reading this. I know how serious rape is and fuck, please go talk to someone if any of you have felt like this made you vulnerable or hurt you, okay? 

Secondly, i hope that u guys still enjoy this fic and dont forget that i really love each and everyone of you guys so fucking much. and if any of you are going through a rough time rn, please do rmb that these times don't last and it'll be tough, but eventually, you're gonna be okay again. <3 and if u ever feel like you need someone, please go talk to someone - and if you wanna, you can come talk to me too. i won't turn any of you guys away on purpose <3