50 Shades Of Steve Rogers

Chapter 23 It Begins

"Hey darlin', the foods here and everyone's downstairs," Steve announced as he walked into the lab I was in, too jumbled to be downstairs, and wanted to be around Tony's things.
It had only been little over an hour or so since my brothers arrived and found out about me, their long lost sister, born from a dead mother, but instead of rage, especially after Dean's reaction, a deep seeded melancholy spread through my veins, which didn't alleviate shit, but add to it.
Sam was probably right.
I didn't know what Dean and Sam had been through all these years, but I could see the listlessness and anger in Dean's eyes, as well as Sam's. It was a weariness all soldiers had after fighting for so long. Their files could only take me so far, but whatever they'd experienced had an everlasting effect on my older brother, one I didn't understand, but for the life of me, I wanted too.
We didn't have the time, I needed to find Tony, I had too, but Dean's rage made we want to know everything about them.
They had our father for years, and yet there was a definite difference at how these two men saw John and I wanted to know why?
Why was my eldest brother so angry?
Who was Adam?
Why was Sam more genuine and understanding about what had unfolded?
My life wasn't easy either. It was littered with near misses, fights, nightmares, and exhaustion, but I had a home to come back too. I had a father who made sure I was cared for, friends who would risk their lives for me, and surrounded me with love, honor, and respect.
I opened their files again, and really looked over the information, trying to understand the two men who looked held similar qualities of my mom and dad.
Maybe because there didn't seem to be much of a family left, except for the few pictures that came from Sioux Falls. They had no one, not even our father seemed to be in pictures of my brothers when they were younger. John, for all intensive purposes seemed to take my brothers with him, while on the hunt, training them, preparing them, at least that's what their files alluded too.
I assumed I would learn more about my father, information which may change the way I saw him as the night wore on, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to know, but I wanted to understand.
As a child John was bigger than life itself, his mere presence demanded attention and respect. His stern voice usually scared me as a child, but he was also attentive, and would kiss my forehead before he put me to bed.
It amazed me how I could remember little things like that, now that my brothers were here, just a few feet away from me, but remembering the past wasn't making any of this easier. I heard the way Dean talked about John, which was full of respect, and maybe fear, but for Sam, his attitude towards our father was not the same, I could hear it in voice, and I kept asking why?
I didn't know if I wanted to know what happened to them, and our father, but gods help me, they were my brothers, and I couldn't stop my bleeding heart from immediately caring for them. Dean may hate me, refuse to believe, but he was family, what I had left after mom and dad died.

"Hey?" Steve remarked, and wrapped his arms around my waist. I settled back against his chest, and let out a deep breath.
"Is all this really happening? I should be focused on finding Tony," I whispered, and clung to his arms, "but they both looked so sad, tired, and angry, especially Dean, Sam seemed to accept it pretty quickly."
"Yes he did, but then again he seems the more level headed one out of the two, and I noticed their sadnes too, but they both just discovered they have a little sister, a happy, healthy sister, you shouldn't judge their reaction so swiftly," he replied, and kissed the back of my head, "Dean's eyes kinda remind me of Buck's when he first came back, but I know you, and we'll help them if they allow us too.."

I closed my eyes, and leaned further into him, "I know I just met them, but my heart bleeds for them.. Dean... I can see the shadows in his eyes, hear it in his voice. I'm already worried about Tony...but," I stammered again, and held onto his hands.
"Honey, you may act like a stubborn she-devil at times, but your loyalty knows no bounds, and they're your brothers, of course you're going to care about what they've gone through," he lamented softly and placed a warm kiss in the middle of my shoulder blades, "I've said this more than once today, but I can't imagine what you must be feeling right now, but I'm here, if it becomes too much."
I slowly turned around so I could face him, letting his determination warm my weeping soul, "I know you are," I sighed, and slowly brought his forehead down on mine, "I'm so scared right now, and I know you and the rest of the team will stand beside me, whatever comes our way, I know that, but whatever happened to Tony, if it's my fault because of what I am..."
"No.. none of this is your fault, you understand me?" He demanded, and tilted my head up. His bright blue eyes enveloped me in comfort, and protection, but a small voice whispered, 'what if it's not enough this time?'
What if this doesn't stop with just Tony?
I wouldn't let whoever we were dealing with take any of them.